Songtexte Brotherhood of the Not Very Well Endowed - TurtleFrogMan
We were down in the basement
Her parents had left and we had our big chance
My hands had optimal placement
I had one up her bra, the other was down in her pants
Her friend was down there with us, she was partially concealed
Behind this ugly basement wall that stood between us
I pulled off my trendy blue jeans and my manhood was revealed
And her friend starting laughing at the size of my penis
She spread the word around high school and told others
About this physical trait of which I'm not proud
And It was then that I joined my current band of brothers
As its often said, misery loves a crowd
I joined the brotherhood of the not very well endowed
This was quite traumatizing
Its no wonder I didn't seek bridges from off which to jump
I grew obsessed with my sizing
I wanted the trunk of the tree but God gave me the stump
I tied fishing weights around it, to try and stretch it out some
I subjected it to gravitational forces
But this gave me painful stretch marks, which was not the desired outcome
I even tried those pills that hall of fame NFL coach Jimmy Johnson endorses
Women say "size doesn't matter, good sex is mental"
They're not impressed by the size, they're not easily wowed
But I don't believe them, I think that they're very judgmental
And When I was with women, I covered myself in a shroud
I've joined the brotherhood of the not very well endowed
Its simply genetics, I was given this organ at birth
It seems kinda silly to spend some much energy hidin' it
They say the length isn't very important, what's important is really the girth
There's a surgery now you can have if you're eager to widen it
With old age, I've grown quite mellow
It helps that my wife is my love, pride and joy
She seems to like my little fellow
She pats it on its head like a good little boy
I'm still not satisfied with the length of my plumbing
I still wish I was the size of a log
But you have to learn to live in spite of your shortcoming
Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog
Being Married to my wife is the ultimate prize
Till death do us part we both solemnly vowed
So she can't trade me in for a much larger size
And having affairs is of course not allowed
I'm in the brotherhood of the not very well endowed
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