Lyrics and translation Charles Penrose - The Laughing Policeman

The Laughing Policeman

I know a fat old policeman
He's always on our street
A fat and jolly red-faced man
He really is a treat

He's too kind for a policeman
He's never known to frown
And everybody says he is the
Happiest man in town!

Oh, ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha!
Ooh-ho-ho, ha-ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha!
Ooh ho-ho-ho, ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha!
Ooh ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha!

He laughs upon point duty
He laughs upon his beat
He laughs at everybody when he's
Walking in the street

He never can stop laughing
He says he's never tried
But once he did arrest a man
And laughed until he cried!

Oh ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha!
Ooh! Ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha!
Ooh! Ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha!
Oh ho-ho-ho, ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha!

His jolly face is wrinkled
And then he shut his eyes
He opened his great mouth
It was a wonderous size

He said, "I must arrest you"
He didn't know what for
And then he started laughing
Until he cracked his jaw!

Oh ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha!
Ooh! Ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha!
Ooh! Ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha, ha-ha ha-ha ha-ha ha-ha ha-ha ha-ha!
Oh ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha!

So, if you chance to meet him
When walking 'round the town
Just shake him by his fat old hand
And give him half a crown

His eyes will beam and sparkle
He'll gurgle with delight
And then you'll start him laughing
With all his blessed might!

Oh ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha!
Ooh! Ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha!
Ooh! Ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha!
Ooh ha-ha, ooh ha! Ha-ha-ha ha-ha!

Le Policier Rieur

Je connais un gros vieux policier
Il est toujours dans notre rue
Un homme gros et joyeux au visage rouge
Il est vraiment un régal

Il est trop gentil pour être policier
On ne l'a jamais vu froncer les sourcils
Et tout le monde dit qu'il est le
Homme le plus heureux de la ville !

Oh, ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha !
Ooh-ho-ho, ha-ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha !
Ooh ho-ho-ho, ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha !
Ooh ha-ha-ha, ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha !

Il rit au poste de contrôle
Il rit sur son territoire
Il rit à tout le monde quand il
Marche dans la rue

Il ne peut jamais arrêter de rire
Il dit qu'il n'a jamais essayé
Mais une fois, il a arrêté un homme
Et a ri jusqu'à ce qu'il pleure !

Oh ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha !
Ooh ! Ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha !
Ooh ! Ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha !
Oh ho-ho-ho, ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha !

Son visage joyeux est ridé
Et puis il a fermé les yeux
Il a ouvert sa grande bouche
C'était une taille merveilleuse

Il a dit : « Je dois t'arrêter »
Il ne savait pas pourquoi
Et puis il a commencé à rire
Jusqu'à ce qu'il se casse la mâchoire !

Oh ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha !
Ooh ! Ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha !
Ooh ! Ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha, ha-ha ha-ha ha-ha ha-ha ha-ha ha-ha !
Oh ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha !

Alors, si tu as l'occasion de le rencontrer
En te promenant en ville
Secoue-le simplement par sa grosse vieille main
Et donne-lui une demi-couronne

Ses yeux brilleront et scintilleront
Il gargouillera de joie
Et puis tu le feras rire
De toutes ses forces !

Oh ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha !
Ooh ! Ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha !
Ooh ! Ha-ha-ha ha-ha-ha ha-ha !
Ooh ha-ha, ooh ha ! Ha-ha-ha ha-ha !