Paroles et traduction Sagopa Kajmer - Evvela Elveda

Evvela Elveda

çocuklugumda çocukluguma inmek gibi bisey bu
dengesiz dilim susar ve içer su
bi sarkim olsun dedim hayata bi katkim
çok verdim lakin aldigimdan az
son nefesi çektim çukuru kaz
içime kordu çöktü lanetin
çokmu naletim neyim ben
içime gömdügüm bu defni kimse çözemez
kalbim tek basinada atar destek ünite istemez
gördüklerimi açiklaman gerekmez
bir kefene iki bas sigdir
benimle olan her daim sagdir
tanrim yagmur yagdir yeryüzünde pislik çok
yalanlarinda yanlis yokta
dogrular dökülürken dlimden benden kötüsü yok
içimde sakli kalbe sapli ok
be hayatin anlami çekip gideceksen
amaci neydi ümitlerinin
selvi boylu karalar bagli
derman olmak isterler sollu sagli istemez canim
zorlu derdim anlatilmaz içte sakli. gönlüm yasakli
elveda sözcüklerimi önüme koydum evvela
cebimde kimsesizligin oyunlariyla yürüdüm basimda bela
elim kolum çaresiz
en gerekli anlarinda benim basim dengesiz
sesim kayitta her daim ses var kulakta
adim saf geçer lugatta
laf çikar agizdan hükmün biter
ben ne kadar istedimki ne kadar verdiniz yeter
baygin halim kokladim eter
yanlis algilandim çok sefer
telafiler gecikti ve ben beter
akti zaman akilda kalanlar neler
devirmedi deviremez beni yaman darbeler
arbedemden geriye kalanlar vücuttaki izler
yanlis nedir dogru nedir
yasamin ikileminde yasamak zorsa
herkes zor insan farkimiz nedir
korkularimizdan korkmanin bilinç altina in bakalim
orda biraz dur bakalim korku nedir
raffine üstad vergisibir hitabedir
kitabem olusmakta ellerim yazmaktan virane
bas pervane döner aklim birkaç arsin havada
uçarken özlediklerim karada
çok atmisim söz verirken hayata

Farewell First

This feels like descending into my childhood, back to my childhood days.
My unbalanced tongue falls silent and drinks water.
I wished to have a song, a contribution to life.
I gave much, but received far less.
I took my last breath, dug the pit.
The curse settled within me, chilling me to the core.
Am I so cursed, what am I?
This burial I've hidden within me, no one can decipher.
My heart beats alone, needing no support unit.
You needn't explain what I've seen.
Fit two heads in one shroud.
Whoever is with me is always right.
My God, let it rain, there's so much filth on this earth.
There's no mistake in your lies,
But as truths spill from my lips, there's no one worse than me.
An arrow lodged in my heart, hidden within.
Oh, life's meaning, if you're going to leave,
What was the purpose of your hopes?
Cypress-tall, dressed in black,
They want to be a remedy, from left to right, but my dear, I don't want it.
My difficult pain, untold, hidden inside. My heart is forbidden.
I put the words "farewell" before me, first and foremost.
I walked with the games of loneliness in my pocket, trouble on my head.
My hands and arms are helpless.
In my most crucial moments, my head is unbalanced.
My voice is always on record, there's always a voice in my ear.
My step passes as naive in the dictionary.
Words come out of the mouth, the judgment ends.
How much I wanted, how much you gave, it's enough.
In my faint state, I sniffed ether.
I was misunderstood many times.
The amends were late, and I'm worse off.
Time flowed, what remains in the mind?
Severe blows haven't and can't knock me down.
What's left of my struggle are the scars on my body.
What is wrong, what is right?
If living is difficult in life's duality,
Everyone is difficult, what's the difference between us?
Descend into the subconscious of fearing our fears, let's see.
Stay there for a while, let's see what fear is.
A refined master, a tax, is an orator.
My book is forming, my hands are ruined from writing.
My head spins like a moth, my mind a few yards in the air.
While flying, the ones I miss are on the ground.
I've made too many promises to life.