Текст песни I Wish I Was Queer So I Could Get Chicks - Bloodhound Gang
If
your
ass
is
a
Chinese
restaurant
I'll
have
the
poo-poo
platter
My
friend
Jerry
Vandergrift
kissed
me
in
Home
Ec.
class
Later
in
the
afternoon
some
jarheads
In
the
locker
room
kicked
my
ass
I
said,
"Guys
I'm
like
you,
I
like
Monster
Trucks
too
Wanna
see
how
many
push-ups
I
can
do?"
I
just
wish
I
was
queer
so
I
could
get
Chicks
dig
guys
that
are
Queer
guys
that
don't
dig
Chicks
that
don't
dig
guys
like
me
See
I'm
not
queer,
I'm
too
ugly
But
if
I
were
handsome
just
imagine
How
great
it
would
be
Incognito
as
gay
though
but
not
actually
That
way
though
pseudo
homo
phony
Maybe
it's
a
stupid
theory
or
maybe
just
stupidity
But
if
I
was
a
queer
bee
in
the
fashion
industry
Scoring
with
a
super
model
would
be
easy
'Cause
super
model
means
voluptuous
But
is
also
is
synonymous
with
super
dumb
You
see
I'd
be
a
good
listener
So
she'd
treat
me
like
a
sister
and
soon
I'd
become
That
trusted
friend
that
cares
that
rubs
her
back
and
braids
her
hair
No,
it
wouldn't
be
a
week
before
I'm
in
her
underwear
I
wish
I
was
queer
so
I
could
get
Chicks
dig
guys
that
are
Queer
guys
that
don't
dig
Chicks
that
don't
dig
guys
like
me
See
I'm
not
queer,
I'm
too
ugly
Doesn't
matter
what
I'm
packin'
in
my
denim
It's
what's
in
my
genes
The
only
smoked
meat
the
only
sausage
I
would
eat
Is
made
by
Jimmy
Dean
See
I'm
not
too
keen
on
the
smell
of
Vaseline
No,
I'm
not
Princess
Di
and
I
don't
wanna
be
a
queen
I
wish
I
was
queer
so
I
could
get
chicks
Anyway
if
I
were
gay
I'd
have
to
Change
my
name
to
Dirk
or
Lewis
Hang
out
with
my
mom's
hair
stylist
his
name
is
Kip
He's
got
a
lisp
he
talks
like
this
And
wear
my
mother's
lingerie
learn
the
songs
of
Broadway
And
appreciate
Depeche
Mode
and
avant
garde
ballet
I
wish
I
was
queer
so
I
could
get
Chicks
dig
guys
that
are
Queer
guys
that
don't
dig
Chicks
dig
guys
that
are
Queer
guys
that
don't
dig
Chicks
dig
guys
that
are
Queer
guys
that
don't
dig
Chicks
that
don't
dig
guys
like
me
See
I'm
not
queer,
I'm
too
ugly
And
I
don't
shave
my
heiny
Don't
shave
my
heiny
See
I'm
not
queer,
I'm
too
ugly
And
I
don't
shave
my
heiny
Don't
shave
my
heiny
See
I'm
not
queer,
I'm
too
ugly
And
I
don't
shave
my
heiny
Don't
shave
my
heiny
See
I'm
not
queer,
I'm
too
ugly
1 Yellow Fever
2 Lift Your Head Up High (And Blow Your Brains Out)
3 [untitled]
4 Fire Water Burn - Donkey version edit
5 Fire Water Burn (Jim Makin’ Jamaican mix)
6 Fire Water Burn (Donkey version)
7 Going Nowhere Slow
8 Your Only Friends Are Make Believe
9 Shut Up
10 Asleep at the Wheel
11 It's Tricky
12 Why's Everybody Always Pickin' On Me?
13 Asleep at the Wheel
14 Reflections Of Remoh
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