Текст и перевод песни Primary feat. E SENS - poison

poison

시간 지나 먼지 덮인 많은 기억
시간 지나면서 내 몸에 쌓인 독
자유롭고 싶은 게 전보다 훨씬 더 심해진 요즘
난 정확히 반쯤 죽어있어
눈에 보이는 건 아니지만 난 믿은 것
그게 날 이끌던 걸 느낀 적 있지 분명
그 시작을 기억해 나를 썩히던 모든 걸 비워내
붙잡아야지 잃어가던 것

지금까지의 긴 여행 꽉 쥔 주먹에
신념이 가진 것의 전부라 말한 시절엔
겁먹고 낡아버린 모두를 비웃었지
반대로 그들은 날 겁 줬지 나 역시 나중엔
그들같이 변할 거라고 어쩔 수 없이
그러니 똑바로 쳐다보라던 현실
그는 뛰고 싶어도 앉은 자리가 더 편하대
매번 그렇게 나와 너한테 거짓말을 해

그 담배같은 위안 땜에 좀먹은 정신
어른이 돼야 된다는 말 뒤에 숨겨진 건
최면일뿐 절대 현명해 지고 있는게 아냐
안주하는 것뿐 줄에 묶여있는 개마냥
배워가던게 그런 것들뿐이라서
용기내는 것만큼 두려운 게 남들 눈이라서
그 꼴들이 지겨워서 그냥 꺼지라 했지
내 믿음이 이끄는 곳 그 곳이 바로 내 집이며

내가 완성되는 곳 기회란 것도 온다면
옆으로 치워놓은 꿈 때문에 텅 빈 껍데기 뿐인
너보단 나에게 마음껏 비웃어도 돼
날 걱정하는듯 말하며 네 실패를 숨겨도 돼
다치기 싫은 마음뿐인 넌 가만히만 있어
그리고 그걸 상식이라 말하지
비겁함이 약이 되는 세상이지만
난 너 대신 흉터를 가진 모두에게
존경을 이겨낸 이에게 축복을

깊은 구멍에 빠진 적 있지
가족과 친구에겐 문제없이 사는 척
뒤섞이던 자기 혐오와 오만
거울에서조차 날 쳐다보는 눈이 싫었어 열정의 고갈
어떤 누구보다 내가 싫어하던 그 짓들
그게 내 일이 된 후엔 죽어가는 느낌뿐
다른 건 제대로 느끼지 못해 뒤틀려버린
내 모습 봤지만 난 나를 죽이지 못해

그저 어딘가 먼 데로
가진 걸 다 갖다 버린대도 아깝지 않을 것 같던 그 때는
위로가 될만한 일들을 미친놈같이 뒤지고 지치며
평화는 나와 관계없는 일이었고
불안함 감추기 위해 목소리 높이며
자존심에 대한 얘기를 화내며
지껄이고 헤매었네 어지럽게
누가 내 옆에 있는지도 모르던 때

그 때도 난 신을 믿지 않았지만
망가진 날 믿을 수도 없어 한참을 갈피 못 잡았지
내 의식에 스며든 질기고 지독한 감기
몇 시간을 자든지 개운치 못한 아침
조바심과 압박감이 찌그러트려 놓은 젊음
거품 덫들 기회 대신 오는 유혹들
그 모든 것의 정면에서 다시 처음부터
붙잡아야지 잃어가던 것

급히 따라가다보면 어떤게 나인지 잊어가 점점
급히 따라가다보면 어떤게 나인지 잊어가 점점
멈춰야겠으면 지금 멈춰 우린 중요한 것들을 너무 많이 놓쳐
급히 따라가다보면 어떤게 나인지 잊어가 점점

poison

With the passage of time, many memories are covered in dust
With the passage of time, poison has accumulated in my body.
These days, I desire freedom more than ever before
I am exactly half-dead
They are not visible to the eye, but I trust them
I definitely felt that they were leading me
Remember the beginning, empty everything that was rotting me
I have to hold on to what I was losing

My clenched fist on the long journey so far
In the days when I said that belief was all I had,
I used to laugh at everyone who was scared and old
On the contrary, they scared me too. Inevitably, in the end, I
Will become like them
So stare straight ahead at reality.
He said that even if he wants to run, it's more comfortable to sit.
He always lies to me and you like that.

That cigarette-like comfort, a moth-eaten mind
What is hidden behind the words that you must become an adult is
Just hypnosis, not that you are becoming wise at all
Just settling for it, like a dog on a leash
Because all I had learned was that,
Because I fear the eyes of others as much as I do courage
I got tired of those faces and just told them to go away
The place where my faith leads me, that place is my home

The place where I will be complete. If an opportunity comes
An empty shell because of the dreams I put aside
As for you, laugh at me as much as you want
As for me, you can hide your failures while pretending to worry about me
You're just afraid of getting hurt, you just stay still
And call it common sense
Even though cowardice is the medicine in a world,
To you, I win respect for everyone with scars
To him who has overcome it.

I've been in a deep hole before
To family and friends I pretend to live without problems
A mixture of self-loathing and arrogance
I even hated the eyes that looked at me in the mirror, my passion was exhausted
The things I hated more than anyone else,
After it became my job, I only felt like I was dying
I can't feel anything else properly, my twisted
I saw my own appearance, but I couldn't kill myself.

Just somewhere far away
At that time, I didn't think it would be a pity to give up everything I had.
Looking for things that could comfort me like a madman and getting tired,
Peace had nothing to do with me
To hide my anxiety, I raised my voice
Talking about pride, getting angry
Rambling and wandering in confusion
At a time when I didn't even know who was next to me.

Even then, I did not believe in God,
But I couldn't believe in a ruined day. I couldn't get it right for a long time.
A tenacious and vicious cold that permeates my consciousness
No matter how many hours I sleep, I can't get a good morning.
Impatience and a sense of oppression that disfigures my youth
Bubble traps, temptations that come instead of opportunities
In front of all that, from the beginning again
I have to hold on to what I was losing

If we follow in a hurry, we will forget what we are, little by little.
If we follow in a hurry, we will forget what we are, little by little.
If we need to stop, we should stop now. We are missing too much of what is important.
If we follow in a hurry, we will forget what we are, little by little.