Dokuhaku - RADWIMPS перевод на английский

Dokuhaku

昨日は話が出来て良かった
考えて見れば思い出話なんて俺たちあんまりしないから
かといって未来を語るわけでもないし
つまりいつでも今の話ばっかりで
今何を作りたいかばっかりで
俺にはそれがちょうどいい
でも昨日久々に昔の話をしてつくづく思ったよ
俺たちは何をあんなに信じ切ってたんだろうね
なにも疑わず３６５日音を鳴らし続けてたんだろうね
なにも知らなかっただけなのかな
それだけだったのかな
８年前いつも電車賃さえギリギリで
スタジオは安いからって深夜の５時間パックに入った
初めてのおんぼろ車はレコーディング帰りの朝の１５号線上で煙を吐いて死んだ
初心者マークを付けて
道路上で立ち尽くすあまりに無力なその車に浴びせられる
クラクションと冷たい視線
日産 パルサー
君の意志を僕たちは忘れないよ
初めての給料が振り込まれるって
作りたてのカード持って新横浜のコンビニに４人で行った
ドキドキしながらＡＴＭをぐるっと囲んで
入金を確認すると思わず店んなかでバンザイして叫んだんだ
１万５千円だったけど初めて認められた気がした
何をやってんだって後ろ指刺されて生きてたような気がしてたけど
それが嫌だったわけじゃないけど
でも嬉しかったんだそんな始めてもお前らと一緒だった
あの時あの時期お前らは何を思ってた？
多分同じ気持ちだったって勝手に思ってる
一緒に同じ時間をくぐりぬけてくれて ありがとう
先なんて何にも見えなかった
いつまでに何をどうしてどうなってそんなの知らない誰も言わない
それが暗黙のルールだった
根拠のない自信それだけで十分だった
俺たちにあるのはそれだけだった
どんだけちっぽけな光でも
光だったら何百倍も大袈裟に受け取った
たまに真面目な顔した現実がこっち見て笑うんだ
そんな時は全速力で逃げた 知るかって
どこの世界にもあるであろう常識
あたりまえ
この世界もそんな物の宝庫だった
中にはいつまでもくすぶるための教科書なんじゃないかって思えるものもあった
目を見開いて大事なもんだけ握って
あとは２秒で捨てた
俺たちは泣き虫だ
どこだろうが誰がいようが何かにつけて呆れるくらい泣いた
なりたい自分が向こう側にいて
なれない自分が目の前にいた
小さな自分を守りたくて
不甲斐なさに潰されそうで
世界にたった４人だけみたいなあの小さなスタジオの中で心が擦り切れるまで話をした
たった一つのコードたった一つのリズムに何十時間何日とかけて
スタジオに入っても音も出さず帰る日もあった
八つ当たりして蹴飛ばしてわめいて怒鳴っていなくなって探して
はっと我に返って何なんだよ俺たちって笑えてきて
そんでまた泣いた俺一人だったら到底生きられなかった
嘘に浸ってたこんなに勇気を使えなかった
使い方も知らないままだった
一人で見るにはとてもじゃないけど大きすぎた
４人で見たからほんとになった
あの時話してたこと覚えてる？
俺は気持ち悪いくらい覚えてる
リズム コード メロディその音楽を作り出すたった３つの言葉がどこまでも無限に感じた
そしてレコーディング
録音して残すというその意味を語った
俺たちから生まれた曲は自分たちの命よりもずっとずっと長く生きるんだ
うちらが消えてなくなった後も俺たちの意思はこの世界に残るんだ
俺たちの言葉を話し続けるんだ何百年後も
そんな大それたことを大真面目に話した
そんな１音をたったひとつの音を鳴らそうって決めたんだ
あなたは僕らの瞳です
俺らはしょっちゅうグニャグニャ迷うけど
そんな時あなたはまっすぐな目を頼ります
どこを見てるんだろう
あなたが見てるその先を目指します
あなたは変わった
とても優しく強くなった
そんな変化もこんな近くで見れて嬉しいです
この前くれた大切な言葉
あれは僕の誇りです
死ぬまでずっと大事にします
あなたが僕らの体です
怠け者のうちらの中で
一人続けることをあなたは止めない
不器用で 一途で 優しい
この４人の根っこはあなたで動きます
見えない所で何を思い 何と戦ってるんだろう
そんなことを考えます
たまには見えるところで浴びてほしい
好きに甘えて見せてほしい
大丈夫だよって言わせてほしい
ネジが外れたあなたも好きです
あなたは僕らのハートです
元気にしてますか？
まっすぐ晴れた気持で今日も生きてますか？
もしそうならきっと俺らもそうだから
あなたの心がそのまま俺らのハートです
良いも悪いも堂々と生きろ
逃げるな 言い訳を探すな 下じゃない前を見ろ
俺が言えるのはそれぐらい
後はたくさん教わった
初めて言うけど何度も救われたから
笑った顔のあなたが好きです
あなたたちは僕の誇りです
俺にとっては奇跡です
あなたたちだけが知る俺がいるでしょう
そんなことがたまらなく嬉しいです
嬉しいです
いつも緊張する
世界で一番最初に曲を聞かせるあの瞬間
でもこれからも変わらず聞いてほしい
俺が作った曲を世界で誰よりも最初に聞いてほしい
昔話は終わり
また作ろう
また始めよう
みんなと

Confession

I'm glad we had a chance to talk yesterday.
Come to think of it, we don't reminisce much, do we?
We don't talk about the future either,
which means we're always focused on the present,
always on what we want to create now.
That's just right for me.
But after talking about the past for the first time in a while yesterday, it really hit me.
What were we so convinced of back then?
We just kept playing music for 365 days without a doubt, didn't we?
Was it just because we didn't know anything?
Was that all it was?
Eight years ago, we were always barely scraping by on train fare.
We booked the cheapest 5-hour late-night pack at the studio.
Our first beat-up car died on Route 15 on the way back from recording one morning.
With a beginner's mark attached,
we stood helpless on the road, bombarded by
honking horns and cold stares.
Nissan Pulsar,
we'll never forget your spirit.
When our first paycheck came in,
we took our brand new cards and went to the convenience store in Shin-Yokohama, all four of us.
We huddled around the ATM, nervous as hell,
and when we confirmed the deposit, we couldn't help but cheer and jump for joy right there in the store.
It was only 15,000 yen, but it felt like the first time we were acknowledged.
It felt like we were living with everyone pointing fingers at us, saying, "What are you doing?"
Not that I minded that,
but I was happy that even in that beginning, I was with you guys.
What were you thinking back then, in those days?
I勝手に assume we all felt the same way.
Thank you for going through the same time with me.
We couldn't see anything ahead.
No one knew or said anything about what, how, or when things would happen.
That was the unspoken rule.
Baseless confidence was all we needed.
That's all we had.
No matter how tiny the light was,
if it was light, we embraced it hundreds of times bigger than it was.
Sometimes reality, with a serious face, would look at us and laugh.
In those times, we ran away with all our might. Like we cared.
Common sense that probably exists in every world,
the obvious,
this world was a treasure trove of such things.
Some of them felt like textbooks on how to stay frustrated forever.
We opened our eyes wide, held onto what was important,
and threw away the rest in two seconds.
We are crybabies.
Wherever we were, whoever was there, we cried at anything, to the point of ridiculousness.
The person we wanted to be was on the other side,
and the person we couldn't be was right in front of us.
We wanted to protect our small selves,
we were about to be crushed by our incompetence,
and we talked until our hearts were worn out in that tiny studio where it felt like we were the only four people in the world.
We spent dozens of hours, days, on a single chord, a single rhythm.
There were days when we went to the studio but didn't even make a sound and went home.
We lashed out, kicked things, screamed, yelled, disappeared, searched,
and suddenly came to our senses, laughing at ourselves, "What the hell are we doing?"
And then we cried again. I couldn't have survived if I were alone.
I was immersed in lies and couldn't use this much courage.
I didn't even know how to use it.
It was too big to see alone.
Because we saw it together, it became real.
Do you remember what we talked about back then?
I remember it disgustingly well.
Rhythm, chord, melody - those three simple words that create music felt infinitely vast.
And recording,
we talked about the meaning of recording and leaving something behind.
The songs born from us will live much, much longer than our own lives.
Even after we're gone, our will will remain in this world.
Our words will continue to speak, even hundreds of years from now.
We talked about such a grand thing with the utmost seriousness.
We decided to play that one note, just one note.
You are our eyes.
We often waver and get lost,
but in those times, we rely on your straight gaze.
Where are you looking?
We aim for the place you are looking at.
You have changed.
You have become very kind and strong.
I'm happy to be able to see such changes up close.
The precious words you gave me the other day,
those are my pride.
I will treasure them forever.
You are our body.
Among us lazy people,
you are the only one who never stops moving forward.
Clumsy, dedicated, and kind,
the roots of these four people are powered by you.
I wonder what you are thinking and what you are fighting against in places we can't see.
I think about those things.
Sometimes I want you to bask in the visible places.
I want you to show us your vulnerability and let us pamper you.
I want to be able to say, "It's okay."
I even love you when you're a little crazy.
You are our heart.
Are you doing well?
Are you living today with a clear and sunny heart?
If so, then I'm sure we are too,
because your heart is our heart.
Live with pride, both good and bad.
Don't run away. Don't look for excuses. Don't look down, look forward.
That's all I can say.
I learned a lot from you.
This is the first time I'm saying this, but you saved me many times.
I love your smiling face.
You are my pride.
To me, you are a miracle.
There is a side of me that only you know.
That makes me incredibly happy.
Happy.
I always get nervous,
in that moment when I let you hear the song for the very first time in the world.
But I want you to keep listening to them.
I want you to be the first person in the world to hear the songs I create.
The reminiscing is over.
Let's create again.
Let's start again.
Together.