Lyrics Questions - Amanda Bergman

Questions, (shining?), where are you going now
Defiling, what to like, when you hold retire
Are we going back, through the fire life
Oh it's said to be over
Or are we going now, with the wholesome (trials?), on the hills we climb

In your hands is someone else, I could see it now
It's not a dance, and no hell is for the lie/light (?)
Oh I lean on rivers, just to dance
I could use no heart
And no madness around the hills, to drift across

What a privilege - just to leave where you leave, before we eat (for the man that grows???)
And now we drift across, the darkened dream
Boy, our faces just lost?

I can find in my way baby knowing that this will be over too x4