Lyrics Lonesome Cowboy Burt (Swaggart Version) - Frank Zappa
My
name
is
Swaggart
I
am
an
asshole
All
my
friends,
They
call
me
"Jim"
(Hi,
Jim!)
I′m
from
Louisiana,
I
make
lots
of
money,
But
I
fucked
up
And
commited
a
sin
Come
out
here
to
Californy,
Just
to
find
me
Some
pretty
girls
(No
shit!)
The
ones
I
seen
Gets
me
so
horny;
Ruby
lips,
'N
teeth
like
pearls!
Wanna
love
′em
all!
In
the
name
of
Jesus!
Wanna
pretty
girl
I'll
even
pay!
I'll
buy
′em
furs!
I′ll
buy
'em
jewelry!
I′ll
never
fuck
them;
Here's
what
I
say:
I′m
lonesome
Cowboy
Jim!
(Speakin'
atcha!)
I
only
give
′em
the
tips
of
him!
(Posin'
atcha!)
My
cowboy
pants,
My
cowboy
dance,
My
bold
advance,
On
this
here
prostitute...
Yodel-oh-oo-pee-hey
Yodel-oh-oo-pee!
(He's
lonesome
Cowboy
Jim
Look
at
the
tip
of
him!)
Come
on
in
this
place,
′N
I′ll
buy
you
a
taste,
You
can
sit
on
my
face
–
Where's
my
prostitute/waitress?
Swaggart,
Swaggart
redneck
(thank
you!)
Swaggart,
Swaggart
redneck
(yessir!)
I′m
an
awful
nice
guy!
(so
you
say)
I
sweat
all
day
in
the
sun!
(oh
yeah,
yeah)
I'm
a
preacher
by
trade,
Quite
a
bundle
like
me,
And
I′m
a
feature
ol'
mumble-mumble
Son-of-a-gun!
(He′s
a
unionized
roofin'
old
Son-of-a-gun!)
Fill
in
the
blank!
When
I
get
off,
I
get,
When
I
get
off,
I
get,
When...
I,
I,
I,
I,
And
then,
Sharkey
says:
When
I
get
off
(pfft!)
I
get
sinful
(Just
the
tip!
Only
the
tip
now,
come
on)
I
spoo
Till
I
goo
On
the
rug
Then
I
find
me
Some
eighteen
ninety-five
Luiann—,
Louisiana
style
prostitute
And
make
her
do
pornographic
stunts
while
I
watch
And
I
have
So
much
fun
Jay-zus!
Jay-zus!
(Pornographic
stunts
and
I
have
so
much
fun)
(What?)
I
huff
And
I
puff
(Hratche-plche
Hratche-plche)
And
I
pump
up
my
sanctified
erection
Till
my
cheeks
Puff
up
An'
turn
red
Along
with
my
neck
(Say,
varmint!)
I
drool
On
my
shirt
Takes
a
little
while
before
I
squirt
But
I′ve
been
doin′
it
for
twenty
years
and
they
haven't
caught
me
yet
UH-OH!
Made
a
mistake
this
time!
Now
I′ve
sinned
Everybody!
(What
an
asshole!)
Made
a
mistake
and
I
sinned,
uh!
Made
a
mistake
and
I
sinned,
ow!
Made
a
mistake
and
I
sinned,
what?
Made
a
mistake
and
I
sinned
Lonesome
Cowboy
Jim!
(Sinnin'
atcha!)
Come
smell
this
fringe-y
shirt!
(Grinnin′
atcha!)
My
cowboy
pants,
My
cowboy
dance,
My
bold
advance,
On
this
here
prostitute...
Yodel-oh-oo-pee-yeh
Yodel-oh-oo-pee!
(He's
lonesome
cowboy
Jim
BOO-HOO-HOO-HOO
Don′t
you
dare
to
laugh
at
him)
(Oh,
tune
me
in
now)
Come
on
in
this
place,
An'
I'll
buy
you
a
taste,
′N
you
can
sit
on
my
face
Where′s
my
prostitute?
Opal,
you
hot
little
bitch!
![Frank Zappa - The Best Band You Never Heard In Your Life](https://pic.Lyrhub.com/img/0/o/4/e/7s9hdse4o0.jpg)
1 The Eric Dolphy Memorial Barbecue
2 Bolero
3 Zoot Allures
4 Godfather Part II
5 Inca Roads
6 Who Needs The Peace Corps?
7 Ring Of Fire
8 Cosmik Debris
9 Find Her Finer
10 I Left My Heart In San Francisco
11 Zomby Woof
12 Mr. Green Genes
13 Florentine Pogen
14 Andy
15 Sofa #1
16 Purple Haze
17 Sunshine Of Your Love
18 Let's Move To Cleveland
19 When Irish Eyes Are Smiling
20 A Few Moments With Brother A. West
21 The Torture Never Stops Part One
22 Theme From Bonanza
23 Lonesome Cowboy Burt (Swaggart Version)
24 The Torture Never Stops Part Two
25 More Trouble Every Day (Swaggart Version)
26 Penguin In Bondage (Swaggart Version)
27 Stairway To Heaven
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