Lyrics The Ballad Of The Blue Cyclone (The End?) - Ray Stevens
Blue
Cyclone,
Oooh...
Well
my
wife
went
out
of
town
'bout
a
year
or
so
back
And
left
me
at
home
by
myself
to
batch,
And
after
five
straight
nights
of
TV
I
was
ready
to
scream.
So
I
called
up
this
beer
drinkin'
buddy
of
mine
And
said,
"Bill,
I
ain't
havin'
a
real
good
time."
He
said,
"Why
don't
we
go
to
the
wrasslin'
matches
and
let
off
A
little
steam?"
Now
I'd
never
seen
the
matches
before
And
by
the
time
we
reached
that
arena
door,
The
crowd
was
already
backed
up
plumb
out
into
the
street.
Yeah,
people
were
pushin'
and
shovin'
like
cattle,
Just
gettin'
in
line
was
a
heck
of
a
battle,
We
had
to
fight
like
the
devil,
but
we
finally
got
ring-side
seats.
Well,
we
bought
a
program
as
we
passed
through
the
door,
Went
to
section
D,
seats
3 and
4
And
about
that
time,
the
announcer
stepped
into
the
ring.
He
said,
"Tonight's
the
greatest
card
ever
been
signed,
We
got
a
tag-team
match
that'll
blow
yer
mind!"
Then
they
lowered
the
lights
and
the
crowd
began
to
scream.
He
introduced
the
Spider
from
parts
unknown,
With
his
trusty
partner,
The
Blue
Cyclone.
They
were
takin'
on
a
team
that
never
had
been
beat.
Then
the
ref
checked
'em
over
and
the
rules
were
explained,
And
somebody
hollered,
"THE
SPIDER'S
GOT
A
CHAIN!"
Then
some
old
lady
with
blue
hair
fell
right
out
of
her
seat.
Well
they
rang
the
bell
and
all
Hell
broke
loose,
My
legs
was
shakin'
like
a
rubber
goose
I'd
never
seen
anything
like
this,
not
even
in
the
war!
The
Cyclone
put
the
Vulture
in
an
airplane
spin
Then
he
body
slammed
him,
and
then
he
did
it
again
I
swear
I
didn't
see
how
that
'ol
boy
could
take
much
more.
It
was
right
about
then
in
the
thick
of
things
That
my
buddy
Bill
threw
a
chair
in
the
ring
And
I
knew
we'd
better
be
headin'
for
the
door.
'Cause
I
saw
the
Cyclone
lookin'
at
us
And
he
was
rubbin'
his
head
and
he's
startin'
to
cuss
And
I
knew
if
he
caught
us
he'd
break
Bill's
neck
for
sure.
Well,
where
we
parked
wasn't
too
far
And
Bill
ran
so
fast
he
beat
me
to
the
car,
Locked
the
doors
and
wasn't
about
to
let
anyone
in.
And
I
turned
around
and
the
Cyclone
was
there
And
he
said,
"Hey
punk,
you
forgot
your
chair!"
And
by
the
look
in
his
eyes,
I
knew
that
this
was
the
end.
Then
he
body
slammed
me
two
or
three
times
And
he
put
his
arms
around
me
from
behind
Then
he
pile-drived
me
right
there
in
the
hard
concrete.
Broke
both
my
arms
and
three
of
my
ribs
It's
the
closest
I've
ever
come
to
being
killed
And
that's
the
last
thing
I
remember
'fore
he
put
me
to
sleep
Blue
Cyclone,
He's
the
meanest
rascal
the
ring
has
ever
known
He'll
make
you
groan,
he'll
make
you
moan,
He'll
lay
you
prone
and
break
your
bones
Blue
Cyclone...
I
woke
up
in
a
hospital
bed,
Stars
a-circlin'
around
my
head,
And
a
plaster
cast
on
just
about
every
bone.
But
the
doctor
said
I'd
be
just
fine,
"These
things
just
take
a
little
time..."
And
three
weeks
later,
he
let
me
go
back
home.
But
I
laid
in
bed
three
weeks
just
thinkin'
"I
believe
I
coulda
took
him
if
I
hadn't
been
drinkin',
So
the
next
time
we
meet,
I
won't
be
on
no
binge.
"Cause
I
hadn't
been
the
same
since
we
had
that
fight,
And
I'd
see
that
Cyclone
in
my
dreams
at
night,
And
I
won't
be
satisfied
'til
I
get
revenge..."
Well,
the
first
thing
my
wife
said
when
I
got
home
Was,
"You'd
better
leave
that
Cyclone
alone".
She
said,
"You
might
not
be
so
lucky
next
time."
So,
I
says
to
her,
"Beg
your
pardon,
ma'am,
But
it
wasn't
YOU
who
got
the
body
slam,"
Then
I
changed
the
subject,
'cause
I
done
made
up
my
mind.
Then
I
called
up
Bill
and
told
him
my
plan
And
all
he
said
was,
"Right
on,
man!
I'd
do
the
same
durn
thing
if
it'd
been
me.
It
all
happened
so
quick
when
that
car
door
slammed,
It
musta
broke
something,
'cause
the
door
locks
jammed.
You
was
already
down,
he's
gone
time
I
got
free."
Bill
said,
"Since
yer
thinkin'
'bout
takin'
him
again,
I
know
two
ol'
boys
who
weigh
210.
They'd
wade
through
hell
just
to
fight
a
circle
saw.
They
both
lift
weights,
so
you
know
they're
mean
And
the
four
of
us
would
make
a
heck
of
a
team.
We
might
not
win,
but
we'd
durn-sure
fight
to
a
draw."
Well,
we
talked
it
over,
they
said
they's
willin'
They'd
stop
at
nothing,
short
of
killin'.
Said
"Hoss,
we'll
back
you
as
long
as
you
wanna
fight."
So
I
checked
around
at
a
few
of
the
bars
And
found
out
where
all
the
wrasslin'
stars
Hung
out
after
the
matches
every
Wednesday
night.
Well,
I
got
there
early
the
following
week,
And
found
me
a
table
where
I
could
see
the
street
And
waited
for
the
Blue
Cyclone
to
hit
the
door.
Well,
after
a
while,
he
finally
appeared,
Sat
down
at
the
bar,
and
ordered
a
beer
And
he
barely
took
a
sip
'fore
I
stepped
to
the
middle
of
the
floor.
I
yelled,
"Hey
Cyclone!
Remember
me?
I'm
the
guy
you
put
to
sleep,
Only
this
time,
you
can
see
I'm
not
alone.
Ha
ha.
You
see
them
two
big
dudes
over
there?"
The
Cyclone
looked
and
said,
"Over
where?"
And
I
turned
around,
and
I'm
a
son
of
a
gun,
they
was
gone!
Then
the
Cyclone
looked
at
me
and
grinned
And
he
said,
"Okay
punk,
here
we
go
again.
It
seems
to
me
that
some
guys
never
learn."
And
then
he
waded
through
them
tables
and
chairs,
Put
a
full-nelson
on
me,
and
grabbed
my
hair,
And
when
he
threw
me
to
the
floor,
I
was
starting
to
get
concerned.
Then
came
a
birrage
of
judo
chops
And
I
was
beggin'
somebody
to
call
the
cops
Before
the
Cyclone
could
commit
a
mortal
crime.
I
sure
breathed
a
sigh
of
relief
When
I
heard
them
ambulance
sirens
scream,
'Cause
I'd
be
dead
now,
if
they
hadn't
gotten
there
on
time.
The
next
thing
I
remember,
they
was
carryin'
me
in
And
the
doctor
said,
"Oh
no,
you
again?"
I
said,
"Doctor,
how
long
you
thing
it'll
be
this
time?"
He
said,
"Boy,
if
you
don't
leave
that
Cyclone
alone,
One
of
these
days,
you
ain't
goin'
home!
You'll
need
the
undertaker's
services,
not
mine."
Blue
Cyclone,
He's
the
meanest
rascal
the
ring
has
ever
known
He'll
make
you
groan,
he'll
make
you
moan,
He'll
lay
you
prone
and
break
your
bones
Blue
Cyclone
The
Blue
Cyclone
![Ray Stevens - Box Set](https://pic.Lyrhub.com/img/u/t/4/2/veq_w124tu.jpg)
1 It's Me Again, Margaret
2 Too Drunk Too Fish
3 Misty
4 Freudian Slip
5 Sittin' Up With The Dead
6 Everything Is Beautiful
7 Power Tools
8 Drivers Education
9 Hang Up And Drive
10 Ahab, The Arab
11 The Ballad Of The Blue Cyclone (The Beginning)
12 Blue Angel
13 The Ballad Of The Blue Cyclone (The End?)
14 Pledging My Love
15 The Woogie Boogie
16 Love Will Beat Your Brains Out
17 The Haircut Song
18 The Streak
19 The Mississippi Squirrel Revival
20 Family Funeral Fight
21 Deerslayer
22 Safe At Home
23 Boogie Woogie
24 Virgil And The Moonshot
25 The Hustler
26 Osama Yo’ Mama
27 Hello Mama
28 Let’s Roll
29 We’re Havin’ A Baby
30 When The Kids Are Gone
31 Turn Your Radio On
32 Kitty Cat’s Revenge
33 Juanita & The Kids
34 Thank You
35 Shriner's Convention
36 Nashville
37 Erik The Awful
38 The Dog Song
39 The Cat Song
40 When I Get Over You
41 The Pirate Song
42 Come On Home To Baseball
43 Gitarzan
44 Bridget The Midget
45 Bon Temps Roulette
46 Freddie Feelgood (And His Funky Little Five-Piece Band)
47 Gone For Good
48 Stand Up
49 The King Of Christmas
50 Be Your Own Best Friend
51 Jeremiah Peabody’s Polyunsaturated Quick-Dissolving Fast-Acting Pleasant Tasting Green And Purple Pills
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