Lyrics i am not brave - Rural Internet

Since SOPHIE died, it's hard to find hope
Like will we ever see a trans girl grow old?
Will I see a mirror at seventy, and if so
Will it feel a little less cold?
Shit, lot of people want me dead, come and have a try
It won't be that hard, pull the trigger, panic out my life
Death ain't shit to me kid, I already did it twice
All my siblings wanna swim but it's infested with great whites
Tell me if shit changed since Leelah and Blake died
Tell me if my best friend's about to be next in line
Tеll me that I'm brave motherfuckеr, do you want to die?
I just wanna be safe, god, fuck a battlecry
I am not brave, I'm tryna escape
Love hurts, hate kills, put it on my name
No one who loves you should make you feel so unsafe
I love you so much and that'll never change, TMPF

It's brave to use your voice
They say it's bravery is a point
But honestly I think that bravery just needs a choice, and
I'm just tired of this motherfuckin' poison
If I'm being real I don't even enjoy it
Bravery is when Superman fuckin' saves the day
But Superman's a super man so why the fuck does he need graves
Bravery should be more like when Lois Lane
Chooses to go out there and try to save the day
But that's not the exemplary story chosen, I mean
I know that they understand that it's potent, but see
They don't understand all of my emotions, and this
Feels so uncertain, feels so upsetting like-
But to not want to show your face in a generation
When discrimination is still just Caucasian faces
That body up the ideal, the right and skinny real deal
The thigh gaps and fine asses [?] gone four years
What happens when your lips are thin?
Or your eyes are squinty?
Teeth are yellow? Acne skin? Girl you're Whitney
That's something that you're accustomed to
If you've never seen the world
Outside this bulletproof chamber [?] the fucking new necessity
Bruises the product instead of lyrics and the melodies
Sorry my thoughts cancerous, you can't create a dance to this
My fragile colored body bitch, I'm not a fucking mannequin
Mask off to the viewers through computer screens we standing in
I see how DOOM deceased and everybody weep
But no one ever really took his message to heart through the screen
Because the Instagram and TikTok still way to post the art
And I don't understand why I don't declare war like Bonaparte, fuck
I'm fat, I'm not empathetic, I'm a just piece of shit
My teeth are crooked, tell 'em to see by how many times it bit
My eyes are squinty, my lips are big, I always play pretend
That one day I'll be ready for the screen but this not it
Contradictions, contradictions, want the best art
But you wanted real fast and Instagram the whole process
You pretend you wanna know the thoughts in my head
But I know if I ever told you then you'll leave me for dead

I guess I have to thank my family
But to that I'm sorry that I'm scared
Because it's the beginning of the end
But if you're here I feel prepared
And I guess I can shout myself out too
For never jumping off that roof
Because if I did that shit for real
Then I could have never done this too
But in a-
Moment, I should take away your life
I may be broken, but I want to be an ender of this strife
And I don't wanna kill you
I don't wanna kill myself
I just wanna save all my friends
But it's hard to save myself
I'm still fighting for my life
They keep taking away our rights
And I'm sorry I'm still running
But I gotta fucking hide
And if I still hung around those people
Or would have overdosed on drugs
I would've choked myself to death
Would've never found real love