Lyrics Trapped In The Drive-Thru (Parody of "Trapped In The Closet" by R. Kelly) - "Weird Al" Yankovic
Seven
o'clock
in
the
evening
Watchin
something
stupid
on
TV
I'm
zoned
out
on
the
sofa
When
my
wife
comes
in
the
room
and
sees
me
And
she
says,
"Is
this
Behind
the
Music
with
Lynyrd
Skynyrd?"
And
I
say,
"I
don't
know..."
Say,
"It's
gettin'
late,
what
you
wanna
do
for
dinner?"
She
says,
"I
kinda
had
a
big
lunch
so
I'm
not
super
hungry."
I
said,
"Well,
you
know,
baby,
I'm
not
starvin'
either
but
I
could
eat..."
She
said,
"So
what
do
you
have
in
mind?"
I
said,
"I
don't
know,
what
about
you?"
She
said,
"I
don't
care...
if
you're
hungry,
let's
eat."
I
said,
"That's
what
we're
gonna
do!
But
first
you
gotta
tell
me
what
it
is
you're
hungry
for?"
And
she
says,
"Let
me
think,
what's
left
in
our
refrigerator?"
I
said,
"Well,
there's
tuna,
I
know."
She
said,
"That
went
bad
a
week
ago!"
I
said,
"Is
the
chili
okay?"
She
said,
"You
finished
that
yesterday!"
I
hopped
up
and
I
said
"I
don't
know.
Do
you
want
to
get
something
delivered?"
She's
like,
"Why
would
I
want
to
eat
liver?
I
don't
even
like
liver!"
I'm
like,
"No,
I
said
'delivered'."
She's
like,
"I
heard
you
say
'liver'!"
I'm
like,
"I
should
know
what
I
said..."
She's
like,
"Whatever!
I
just
don't
want
any
liver!"
Well,
I
was
gonna
say
something
But
my
cell
phone
started
to
ring
Now
who
could
be
callin'
me?
Well,
I
checked
my
caller
ID
It
was
just
cousin
Larry
Callin'
for
the
third
time
today
My
wife
said,
"Let
it
go
to
voicemail."
I
said,
"Okay."
"Where
were
we?
Oh,
dinner,
right!
So
what
do
you
want
to
do?"
She
said,
"Why
don't
you
whip
up
somethin'
in
the
kitchen?"
"Yeah,"
I
said,
"why
don't
you?"
And
then
she
said,
"Baby,
can't
we
just
go
out
to
dinner,
please?"
I
says,
"No"
She
says,
"Yes"
I
says,
"No"
She
says,
"Yes"
I
says,
"No"
She
says,
"Yes...
Oh,
here's
your
keys"
I
step
a
little
bit
closer
Say,
"Okay,
where
ya
want
to
go?"
She
says,
"How
about
The
Ivy?"
I
said,
"Yeah,
well,
I
don't
know
I
don't
feel
like
gettin'
all
dressed
up
And
eatin'
expensive
food"
She's
says,
"Olive
Garden?"
I
say,
"Nah,
I'm
not
in
the
mood
And
Burrito
King
would
make
me
gassy
There's
no
doubt"
She
says,
"Just
forget
about
it"
I
said,
"No,
I
swear
I'm
gonna
take
you
out!"
Then
I
get
an
idea
I
say,
"I
know
what
we'll
do!"
She
says,
"What?"
I
say,
"Guess!"
She
says
"What?"
I
say,
"We're
goin'
to
the
drive-thru!"
So
we
head
out
the
front
door
Open
the
garage
door
Then
I
open
the
car
doors
And
we
get
in
those
car
doors
Put
my
key
in
the
ignition
And
then
I
turn
it
sideways
Then
we
fasten
our
seat
belts
As
we
pull
out
the
driveway
Then
we
drive
to
the
drive-thru
Heading
off
to
the
drive-thru
We're
approaching
the
drive-thru
Getting
close
to
the
drive-thru
Almost
there
at
the
drive-thru
Now
we're
here
at
the
drive-thru
Here
in
line
at
the
drive-thru
Did
I
mention
the
drive-thru?
Well,
here
we
are
In
the
drive-thru
line,
me
and
her
Cars
in
front
of
us,
cars
in
back
of
us
All
just
waiting
to
order
There's
some
idiot
in
a
Volvo
With
his
brights
on
behind
me
I
lean
out
the
window
and
scream
"Hey,
what
you
trying
to
do,
blind
me?"
My
wife
says,
"Maybe
we
should
park,
we
could
just
go
eat
inside."
I
said,
"I'm
wearin'
bunny
slippers
So
I
ain't
leavin'
this
ride..."
Now
a
woman
on
a
speaker
box
Is
sayin',
"Can
I
take
your
order,
please?"
I
said,
"Yes
indeed,
you
certainly
can
We'd
like
two
hamburgers
with
onions
and
cheese."
Then
my
wife
says
"Baby,
hold
on,
I've
changed
my
mind!
I
think
I'm
gonna
have
a
chicken
sandwich
instead
this
time"
I
said,
"You
always
get
a
cheeseburger!"
She
says,
"That's
not
what
I'm
hungry
for."
I
put
my
head
in
my
hands
and
scream
"I
don't
know
who
you
are
anymore!"
The
voice
on
the
speaker
says
"I
don't
have
all
day."
I
said,
"Then
take
our
order
and
we'll
be
on
our
way!
I
wanna
get
a
chicken
sandwich
and
I
want
a
cheeseburger
too"
She's
like,
"You
want
onions
on
that?"
I'm
like,
"Yeah,
I
already
said
that
I
do
Plus
we
need
curly
fries
And
don't
you
dare
forget
it!
And
two
medium
root
beers
No,
just
one,
we'll
split
it."
Then
I
said
"I'm
guessin'
that
you're
probably
not
too
bright
So
read
me
back
my
order
Let's
make
sure
you
got
it
right."
She
says
"One
- you
want
a
chicken
sandwich
Two
- you
want
a
cheeseburger
Three
- curly
fries,
and
a
large
root
beer"
"Stop!
Don't
go
no
further!
I
never
ordered
a
large
root
beer
I
said
medium,
not
large!"
Then
she
says,
"We're
havin'
a
special
I
supersized
you
at
no
charge."
"Oh."
And
that's
all
I
could
say,
was
"Oh."
And
she
says,
"Now
there
is
somethin'
else
That
I
really
think
you
should
know
You
can
have
unlimited
refills
For
just
a
quarter
more."
I
say
"Great,
except
we're
in
the
drive-thru,
so
what
would
I
want
that
for?"
Then
she
says,
"Wait
a
minute
Your
voice
sounds
so
familiar...
hey,
is
this
Paul?
And
my
wife
is
all
like
"No,
that
ain't
Paul
Now
tell
me,
who's
this
Paul?"
She
says,
"Oh,
he's
just
some
guy
Who
goes
to
school
with
me
I
sat
behind
him
last
year
And
I
copied
off
of
him
in
Geometry."
I
said,
"I
know
a
guy
named
Paul
He
used
to
be
my
plumber
He
was
prematurely
bald
And
he
moved
to
Pittsburgh
last
summer
He
also
had
bladder
problems
And
a
really
bad
infection
on
his
toe."
And
she
says,
"Mister,
please,
you
can
stop
right
there
That's
way
more
than
I
needed
to
know!"
And
then
we
both
were
quiet
And
things
got
real
intense
Then
she
says,
"Next
window,
please
That'll
be
five
dollars
and
eighty
two
cents!"
So
we
inched
ahead
in
line
Movin'
painfully
slow
I
got
a
little
bored
So
I
turned
on
the
radio
Click,
turned
it
off
Because
my
wife
was
getting
a
headache
So
we
both
just
sat
there
quietly
for
her
sake
Then
I
looked
at
her
And
she
looked
back
at
me
And
I
said,
"Um,
I
think
you
have
somethin'
in
your
teeth."
She
turned
away
from
me
And
then
turned
back
and
said,
"Did
I
get
it?"
I
said,
"Yeah,
well,
I
mean,
most
of
it
But
hey,
ya
know,
don't
sweat
it."
Then
she
said,
"How
about
now?"
I
said,
"Yeah,
almost
There's
still
a
little
bit
there,
but
don't
worry
It's
probably
just
a
piece
of
toast."
Now
we're
at
the
pay
window
Or
whatever
you
call
it
Put
my
hand
in
my
pocket
I
can't
believe
there's
no
wallet!
And
the
lady
at
the
window's
like
"Well,
well,
well,
that'll
be
five
eighty-two."
I
turn
around
to
my
wife,
and
say
"How
much
have
you
got
on
you?"
She
just
rolls
her
eyes
and
says
"I'll
pay
for
this,
I
guess"
So
she
reaches
into
her
purse
And
busts
out
the
American
Express
I
hand
it
to
the
lady
And
she
says
"Oh
dear,
It's
gotta
be
cash
only
We
don't
take
credit
cards
here."
I
took
back
the
card
and
said
"Gee,
really?
Well,
that
sucks."
And
that's
when
I
found
out
My
wife
was
only
carryin'
three
bucks
I
said,
"I
thought
you
were
gonna
hit
the
ATM
today"
She
says,
"I
never
got
around
to
it,
so
where's
your
wallet
anyway?"
And
I
said,
"Never
mind,
just
help
me
to
find
some
change..."
Now
the
lady
at
the
window
Is
lookin'
at
me
kind
of
strange
And
she
says,
"Mister,
please,
we
gotta
move
this
line
along"
I
said,
"Now,
hold
your
stinkin'
horses,
lady!
We
won't
be
long."
So
I
looked
around
inside
the
glove-box
And
checked
the
mat
beneath
my
feet
I
found
a
nickel
in
an
ashtray
And
a
couple
pennies
and
a
dime
in
the
space
between
the
seats
Before
long
I
had
a
little
pile
of
coins
of
every
sort
The
lady
counts
it
up
and
says
"You're
still
about
a
dollar
short"
And
now
my
woman's
got
this
weird
look
Frozen
on
her
face
She
screams,
"You
know,
I
wasn't
even
really
hungry
in
the
first
place!"
And
so
I
turned
around
To
the
cashier
again
I
shrugged
and
said:
"Okay,
forget
the
chicken
sandwich
then"
So
I
pick
up
my
change
Pick
up
my
receipt
And
I
drive
to
the
pickup
window
Man,
I
just
can't
wait
to
eat
And
now
we
see
this
acne-ridden
kid
about
sixteen
Wearin'
a
dorky
nametag
that
says
"Hello,
my
name
is
Eugene."
And
he
hands
me
a
paper
bag
I
look
him
in
the
eyes
And
I
say
to
him,
"Hey,
Eugene,
could
I
get
some
ketchup
for
my
fries?"
Well,
he
looks
at
me
And
I
look
at
him
And
he
looks
at
me
And
I
look
at
him
And
he
looks
it
me
And
I
look
at
him
And
he
says,
"I'm
sorry!
What
did
you
want
again?"
I
say
"Ketchup!"
And
he
says,
"Oh
yeah,
that's
right
I
just
spaced
out
there
for
a
second
I'm
really
kind
of
burnt
tonight."
And
then
he
hands
me
the
ketchup
And
now
we're
finally
drivin'
away
And
the
food
is
drivin'
me
mad
With
its
intoxicating
bouquet
I'm
starvin'
to
death
By
the
time
we
pull
up
at
the
traffic
light
I
say,
"Baby,
gimme
that
burger
I
just
gotta
have
a
bite!"
So
she
reaches
in
the
bag
And
pulls
out
the
burger
And
she
hands
me
the
burger
And
I
pick
up
the
burger
And
then
I
unwrap
the
paper
I
bite
into
those
buns
And
I
just
can't
believe
it
They
forgot
the
onion!
!["Weird Al" Yankovic - Straight Outta Lynwood](https://pic.Lyrhub.com/img/2/r/h/m/e8fyixmhr2.jpg)
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6 Virus Alert
7 Confessions Part III (Parody of "Confessions Part II" by Usher)
8 Weasel Stomping Day
9 Close But No Cigar
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11 Trapped In The Drive-Thru (Parody of "Trapped In The Closet" by R. Kelly)
12 Don't Download This Song
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