Lapse

I started smoking again this week
But I went three months, so I think it's sweet
I've had some stress, and it's been quite peak
But it's not an excuse and it's not that deep

My life give me ups and downs
But I've got a big heart and it's inside out
I think about smoking, fuck it, it's calm
I really don't think it'll do much harm

If I die
At least I lived while I was still alive
When heartbreak is the next stop
And I need to take the edge off
I'll smoke my broken heart away

I started smoking again somehow
Won't tell my parents when they come round
They'll be disappointed and let down
But my mum's gonna say I still make her proud

When life gives me loads of pain
I put on a brave face and I stand in the rain
In the backyard, smoking, it's calm
I really don't think it'll do much harm

If I die
At least I lived while I was still alive
When heartbreak is the next stop
And I need to take the edge off
I'll smoke my broken heart away

And I wish all of this was easier
And I could find some other way
To help alleviate the pain
But I can't

And I've seen on social media
There was a man who did the same
And he passed away

Oh, it's fucking hard
The lighter brings the spark

Cause if I die
At least I lived while I was still alive
When heartbreak is the next stop
And I need to take the edge off
I'll smoke my broken heart away

I'll smoke my broken heart away