Through A Keyhole

My mother was frightened by a snoopy neighbor
Who poked his eye through mother's keyhole
And that is why I am what I am today
The man who looks through the keyholes along Broadway

My job is to be alert
And get the low-down on all the dirt
The dirt that gathers on Broadway's skirt
For that's how I earn my pay
The man who looks through the keyholes along Broadway

Would you like to take a look through a keyhole?
If you'd like to get the in
On the latest bit of sin
Have a look
Life is like an open book through a keyhole

If you wonder what occurs
'Ere the lady gets her furs
Have a look
Angry people who think they're tough
Start to threaten but that's a bluff
They may holler but they won't stuff up their keyhole
So come on and have a look through a keyhole
If you'd like to get a view
View of who is cheating who
Have a look

Would you like to take a look through a keyhole?

If you'd like to get the in
On the latest bit of sin

Have a look
La la la la la la la
Through a keyhole
If you wonder what occurs
'Ere the lady gets her furs
Have a look

Lovely ladies of every kind
Think they're safe when they pull the blind

I see just what is on their mind

Through a keyhole
So come on and have a look through a keyhole
If you want to see New York
Getting ready for the stork
Have a look
Life is like an open book through a keyhole
If you want to get a load
Of the husband on the road
Have a look

Angry people who think they're tough

Angry people start

Start to threaten but that's a bluff

But that's a bluff

They may holler but they won't stuff up their keyhole
So come on and have a look through a keyhole

If you'd really like to know
How she got into the show

Have a look