A Natural

Today is not a good day for me
For today, I found out I was mad
As I have discovered this in the last 45 minutes
My madness is still new
Fresh in my mind as to say
So I can understand it more

It has come to my attention that over the past year and a half
I have acquired a condition known as acute paranoid schizophrenia
In relation to everyone and everything I did
It gradually worsened
Through the year to this point of realization
That I have a twin mind

And in the intervening time
I consume with a passion various things
To keep the main side happy
And as the main side grew hungrier quicker
And if it wasn't fed each time
It began to eat the other

Distrust of everything, it ran in the family
At least on my mother's side
There was too much trust in the other
I am its eldest offspring
And I too have distrust too much
That's why I don't want children

Each person has their own tragedy
Mine as I found out was this fear of my old lady
Turning into the very same old lady
That I despised when I grew up
But you fall in love
And is it possible to fall in love with every woman you meet?
You just stand there with your mouths open
Thinking, wishing I never existed

But this is my time
And the girl I've just met should be here
'Cause here was a woman
Who held me and did not copy my every move
She just let it happen
Never asked, but I answered
I myself, I'm heaven and hell

Today is not a day for me
Today is not for me
Today is not a day for me
Today is not for me

Today is not a day for me
Today is not for me
It's not for me