Lyrics How Did “Army” Come About? - Ben Folds Five

Well i thought about the army
Dad said, son you′re fucking high
And i thought, yeah there's a first for everything
So i took my old man′s advice
Three sad semesters
It was only fifteen grand spent in bed
I thought about the army
I dropped out and joined a band instead
Grew a moustache and a mullet
Got a job at chic-fil-a
Citing artistic differences
The band broke up in may
And in june reformed without me
And they got a different name
I nuked another grandma's apple pie
And hung my head in shame
Been thinking a lot today
Been thinking a lot today
Oh, i think i'll write a screenplay
Oh, i think i′ll take it to LA
Oh, i think i′ll get it done yesterday
In this time of introspection
On the eve of my election
I say to my reflection
God, please spare me more rejection
'Cause my peers, they criticize me
And my ex-wives all despise me
Try to put it all behind me
But my redneck past is nipping at my heels
I′ve been thinking a lot today
I've been thinking a lot today
I′ve been thinking a lot today
I thought about the army...