Lyrics Ballad of Johnny and Jack - Jinkx Monsoon

It was a nowhere town down a no-name road when it was falling by the freeway dives
And you know Johnny and Jack were never going back if it was all they ever did with their lives
Yeah, after 17 years of saying yes and please and being bored of the old homestead
They thought it's time to see some other folks get down on their knees and have 'em begging out please instead
You see, Johnny would have fun when Jack would pull out his gun and go
BRACKITY-BRICKITY-BOP-A-BANG-BOOM
And Johnny's sweet lies when he batted those eyes and said, "Oh lover, come sit down"
You wanna go for a ride?
And they were almost making it work
They had the world going rattle and jerk
But when the blood in the veins cooled down
They had to take it to the next town
For a highway bound crazy couple of kids you know the living didn't turn out bad
Only paying for gas, going nowhere fast, and robbing folks for all that they had
They'd make a quick pit stop at every Mom and Pop and squeeze 'em out of every dime
They never hit one snag 'til they threatened a nag right behind 'em in the checkout line ("CALL THE COPS!")
But Johnny still got the thrill when Jack was shooting to kill and going
BRACKITY-BRICKITY-BOP-A-BANG-BOOM
And Jack was all sighs, looking in Johnny's eyes and hearing "Oh, I promise, baby, never again"
Now let's put it in drive
They were almost making it work
They had the world going rattle and jerk
But when the blood in the veins cooled down
They had to take it to the next town
You know they didn't even pass up the county line before the law could call an end to their game
Yeah, there were 32 of the boys in blue barricading each and every land
And only then did Jack think of turning back
He said, "Baby, we've gone to far"
But Johnny wasn't there, said he didn't care
"If they want us, well here we are"
Deputy One shot out Jackie's gun
With a BRACKITY-BRICKITY-BOP-A-BANG-BOOM
And Officer Byer looked in Johnny's eyes and said, "Oh honey, you couldn't win"
Now let's go for a ride
So beware of the boys who bat their eyes and steal your soul
Break the other line that binds you, but make sure you know where to go
'Cause they were almost making it work
They had the world going rattle and jerk
But when the blood in the veins cooled down
They had to take it to the next town
'Cause they were almost making it work
They had the world going rattle and, rattle and jerk
Almost making it work. They had the world going rattle and jerk.