Lyrics Refill - Lou The Human

And I still stay high just more lowkey now
I quit the lean and OE, it only slowed me down
Been tryna get a hold of myself, 'cause you would never hold me down
My new girls miss the old me now
And shit i think I hate myself
Lately I just ain't myself
Tryna save everybody else and I can't even save myself
Disgusted in the mirror
Tryna function at this function
I ain't even wanna be here
But I gotta show face more
I gotta see my place more
I'm used to being homeless
I don't ever like to stay long
So how could I expect you to wait
When I been waking up lately and forgetting the state
Stay in a daze so I'm spaced out forgetting the day
Tryna remember why the fuck I even get in this game it's like
Every time I see my nieces they older
Ain't even see em grow up
What if they needed a shoulder
And the girl I love is still on the block I left
Think my old friend is smoking rocks again
I just wish I could talk to him
I just wish we could start again to relive this shit
Before the city took our innocence
Tryna play the hand I'm dealt
From where they dealing shit
I can't even deal with shit
Fuck rap and a deal n shit
I feel guilty
My old homies is still in the field really
Probably screaming fuck me so I don't know how to feel really
They all said they love me look around they ain't still wit me
A lot that's concealed in me
A lot of it's ill
Getting high so the pain'll stop
When I was younger I used to think I could save the block
Now I'm spending Bands like I don't know how to save a lot
My ex saying I changed a lot
I can't even say that it's not
True
All this fame I forgot Lou
All this drink I forgot you
At least I did until the morning
I used to go places people knew me so I could feel I'm important
I used to want people to see me and now I can't avoid it
And it still ain't filling this void
I don't know what's real anymore
I'm lying to people I love
I don't think I feel anymore
A lost boy with lost marbles
I lost star and found stardom
I found me when I lost all em yeah
I dream about you and I don't know what it means yeah
Some Jean Grey shit, I don't know what it seems like but
I fell a fiend, and rose a Phoenix my flow the meanest
You ain't get the vision, I always seen it
Fuck the scene I seen what it does to people so fuck it y'all could keep it
I'll die the meanest and live the nicest
I didn't write this I bombed the paper like isis
A bad vibe is in your words you not speaking I could peep it so I'm defeating
Anyone thinking they running this race that I started
With the baton they never gave me I'll take it the farthest
I need million dollar mansion you thinking apartments
Guess thats what set us apart dog you thinking in boxes
And I left that, kid from the west that
Said fuck dealing, no drug cured em I'm stuck ill and
Wayne before prison too dedicated so fuck ceilings
And fuck feelings, in this cycle of life in one wheeling
Training wheel rappers be bragging bout how they never falling
Ain't change they number but wonder why I was never calling
I call a spade a spade, hands I'm dealt I bet I play blind folded and still black jack while I call your bluff
All these rappers you calling tough shit was all a front
I never fronted or backed down it was all or nothing
Remember days that I ain't eat and got a smaller stomach
Remember we was smoking weed they on a stronger substance now
And some of 'em turn they back on me
I left home with no intentions of turning back homie
The drugs stopped working while I'm battling this
I was broke all I had was reality checks
Losing people over business and they say don't take it personal it isn't but I'm starting to think different
Yeah but I started to think listen
Fuck the dissing and who's missing remember why even I started this mission
I can't do shit if my heart isn't it
My minds gone and man that shit has been gone for a minute
But then again, everybody I ever met up in this game shady ironic I'm the one that they compare to Em
I played crazy and got lost in that shit on some Heath ledger shit
But still he'd never quit
I'm from painkiller paradise where E wet and spliffs
All they know I told myself that I would be better bitch yeah
Sometimes I wish I woulda picked up a different profession
But how else could I deal with this built up aggression
Fucked over so many times but I still been finessing
Shit sometimes I think I'm cursed but it's still been a blessing
I lit the fuse, woulda been quit but got shit to prove
My shit list is a page or two
I charge it to the game, and paid my dues
So listen dude I got shit to move
From the same hood some as killers but I got different views
I speak ill, it's love peace but I beat kill
Each scale Doc said I'm sick shit I agree still
I'm prescribed to real shit so here's a free pill
Back to back like Meek Mill if you need a refill yeah
If you need a refill

Hey, sweetie
Ugh, I'm sending you a big hug, my love
I was just thinking about you too
Just hang in there, just for today
Just for today, papi, know that I love you
Know that this too is gonna pass and it sucks
And I'm so sorry, I am so sorry, my heart bleeds for you
What you're going through, all of this
You can do this though, I know you can
Just right now, need you strong too
I love you, I love you so much baby
Bye, honey

And I'm all yours, all yours
And I'm all yours (Show me)
I'm all yours, all yours
I'm all yours