Lyrics Shaftesbury Avenue - Momus

I think you're wailing for someone
And I think he's not going to show
And there's this little place round the corner
Wanna go?

Uptown - charcoal and braziers
Uptown - where the traffic is crazier
Uptown - where the people are racier
And the stage door is unlit

Uptown - I'm going up there just as I am
Going to dance down the roofs of the traffic jam
Uptown - 'cause I've got something that's itching me
And here's where I'm going to scratch it

Appearing in the West End:
Tottenham Hotspurs with Rolex handshakes
And crocodile sunlans
(Appearing in the West End)
JAPs and prunes, cops and robbers
Touts with faces like the phantom of the opera
Council house tarts and cocktail bars
Looking for a boyfriend
(Appearing in the West End)
Foetus in the dish, falcon down the pan
Feasts in the dustbin
(Appearing in the West End)
Gerrard Street girl watch as I go
My hungry blue eyes below your window
(Appearing in the West End)
If I could just speak Cantonese
You could be my best friend
(Appearing in the West End)

There's some greal entertainment lined up for me
On BBC1
But meet me on Shahesbury Avenue
(Operating for fun, looking for a good time)
Sophisticated sister, so much better at life than me
Meet me on Shaftesbury Avenue
Talk to me
Dance with me
Make love with me
Make me somebody

Uptown - walking all night all alone
Uptown - through the entertainment zone
Uptown - searching for sweet oblivion
'Til the bitter end

Uptown - nothing comes to him who waits
Uptown - no free lunches, no dinner dates
Uptown - got to take your chance at a back door dance
With a very special friend

Appearing in the West End:
Streatham princesses in sherbert stilettoes
And matt black toy boys who act like heroes
(Appearing in the West End)
Businessman sleaze, whips made of liquorice
No sex please: we're British
(Appearing in the West End)
Chinatown pimps and handshake whores
And Tackhead caps at the Astoria doors
(Appearing in the West End)
XR1 sunroofs open on the night
Bragging Kiss FM rapper's delight
(Appearing in the West End)
Gerrard Street girl watch as I go
My hungry blue eyes below your window
(Appearing in the West End)
If I could just speak Vietnamese
You could be my best friend
(Appearing in the West End)

There's some great entertainment lined up for me
On BBC1
But meet me on Shaftesbury Avenue
(Operating for fun, looking for a good time)
Sophisticated sister, so much better at life than me
Meet me on Shaftesbury Avenue
Talk to me
Dance with me
Make love with me
Make me somebody
Make me somebody
Make me somebody
Make me somebody