Saturday Night

It was Saturday night and I was feelin' kinda sporty
Went to the bar, copped me a forty
Got kinda high and, uh, kinda drunk
So I kicked the ass of this little punk
Forgot my key, had to ring my bell
My mama came down, she said "Who the hell?"
Wait mama, wait, it's me, your little son
Before I knew it my mom pulled a gun
"I know who you are, but who the hell is that?"
I turned around, man, this bitch was fat
I really don't know how she got into the car
I must have picked her up when I left the bar
You know, homie, homie, man, I wanted to chill
But you know how mothers are, she wanted to ill
So I said, "Hey baby, is you on the pill?
'Cause tonight I wanna be your lover
Just one thing, I forgot to buy a rubber"
Waited a little while, then we snuck upstairs
Step by step with a hint of fear
We got into my room, bitch started to scream
Mama busted in, what a fucked up scene
Shirt ripped off, drawers down on my knees
Wait mama, wait mama, wait, wait please
Put back your gun, put down your brew
My mom fucked up the room
The bitch jumped up with no respect
I had to put the big, big bitch in check
I said, "You come a little closer and you will get shot
Sober anyway, I don't need no cock"
Oh yeah, those wild Saturday nights, man
You know what I mean, they wild as shit, man
They wild, man, you know
Yeah, man, let me tell you about
Another Saturday night experience I had
It was Saturday night and I was feelin' kinda funny
Gold around my neck, pockets full of money
Went to the corner, man, who did I see
But this super bad bitch lookin' back at me
I said, "Fly lady and you got a big butt"
Bitch turned around, all she said was, "What?"
I said, "My name is Schoolly baby, a-what is yours?"
Before I knew it up come my boys
Noisy as hell and drunk as shit
Said, "Yo Schoolly School, what time is it?"
Looked a little closer and I knew it was a gag
What I thought was a girl was nothin' but a fag
Oh man, you know what I mean, you know what I mean
M&M, man, it's some wild Saturday nights, man
You know, I got somethin' else to say, man
I got somethin' to say, man, to everybody, it's like this
Everybody rappin' but they don't know how
Shoulda seen the boy rappin' to the cow
He rapped so hard that the nigga saw smoke
He lit up the cheeba and they both took a toke
The cow got high and the boy got by
Don't come in my face and ask me why
Cheeba cheeba, y'all
Yeah, it's that cheeba cheeba makin' 'em feel like that
Cheeba cheeba, y'all
Umm, some call it cheeba, some call it weed
It's the killer, it's a filler, it's the thing that you need
So cheeba cheeba, y'all
Little Miss Muffet sat on a suffet
Smokin' a J and scratchin' her itch
Along came spider, sat down beside her
And said, "Yo, what's up with that bitch?"
But then down the road came Mary and her lamb
Smokin' a lacy and eachin' every hand
The poor little spider, he couldn't score any
They was two dollar bitches and he only had a penny
Cheeba cheeba, y'all
Yeah, cheeba cheeba, y'all
Let me tell ya a little tale about Peter the pimp
Sucker MC tryin' to cop a lip
Rolled around town in a couple of cars
Got gagged by the man tryin' to stick up a bar
The judge said, "Boy, what was on your mind?"
He said, "I had some cheeba cheeba, cocaine and some wine"
The judge said, "Boy, relax and have a beer
We won't be doin' shit for the next ten years"
Cheeba cheeba, y'all
Yeah, it's that cheeba cheeba
Cheeba cheeba, y'all
Some call it cheeba, some call it weed
It's the killer, it's a filler, it's the thing that you need
So cheeba cheeba, y'all
Yeah, you know, me and my man Code Money
My man M&M, we're just chillin', you know what I mean
My name happens to be Schoolly D if you didn't guess by now
You know, only Schoolly D gon' make some crazy-ass shit like this
I get back
Take it away, Coob