Lyrics Involuntary Pain - Terrance T

Man I swear to god
When I lost you
It's just like I lost me too damn
I'm ready to spazz i'm ready to crash I can't even laugh I'm really heated
Ain't cried in years I'm flooded with tear the news that I got I couldn't believe it
They called my phone and said you were gone my heart was torn into pieces
Don't know how to feel I wish it wasn't real it was too soon for you to leave me

Now I'm sitting here outta my body and outta my mind don't know what to think
I don't wanna talk I don't wanna chill I don't wanna eat I don't wanna drink

I'm having heart aches back to back I swear to god this shit hurt
I just wished I could've hugged you before you left this earth

My only regret is that I move too far from out the city
Not knowing what I'm missing & not bringing you with me
Reminiscing on all the laughs and the jokes that we shared
Ma I'm trying to keep my head up but it's too much to bare

Plus lil noah look just like you look at him I see you
I give him and ni'asia my all that's what real fathers do
And its true I buried you you ain't have to bury me
I know you happy you ain't lose your only child to the streets

Don't know how to grieve l'm suppressing
All of my feelings become aggression
Trying to be strong for me and pops while I'm head to head with depression
Give me a second I can admit I'm headed to where I'm supposed to be
But it don't feel right cause I can't share with who gave birth to me

Lord knows I wanna call your phone just to hear your voice
Lord knows I'll bring you back if I had the choice
But I don't and it sucks it is what it seems
I'm just waiting on you to come visit me in my dreams

So we can talk one more time and I can vent what's on my mind
And get some pain off me heart cause I'm scared ain lying
But ain blind to the fact that we all gotta die
It's just hard to tell somebody that you love the most bye

Forever you will be loved forever you will be missed
Forever yeehhh I got ya I promised ya I wouldn't quit
And them facts plus tax ya baby boy he bout to blow
I'm screaming RIP my moma out the gate at every show

You was so charismatic a cherishing mother
We went from nothing to something you was one hell of a hustler
Plus ya heart was pure ma you rubbed off on me
Cause i'm foreva trying to help somebody get on their feet aye