Lyrics Smut - Tom Lehrer
(Introduction,
spoken:)
I
do
have
a
cause,
though,
it
is
obscenity.
I'm
for
it!
Thank
you.
Unfortunately,
the
civil
liberties
types
who
are
Fighting
this
issue
have
to
fight
it,
owing
to
the
nature
Of
the
laws,
as
a
matter
of
freedom
of
speech
and
stifling
Of
free
expression
and
so
on.
But
we
know
what's
really
involved:
Dirty
books
are
fun!
That's
all
there
is
to
it.
But
you
can't
Get
up
in
a
court
and
say
that,
I
suppose.
It's
simply
a
matter
Of
freedom
of
pleasure,
a
right
which
is
not
guaranteed
by
The
Constitution,
unfortunately.
Anyway,
since
people
seem
To
be
marching
for
their
causes
these
days,
I
have
here
a
march
For
mine.
It's
called:
Smut!
Give
me
smut
and
nothing
but!
A
dirty
novel
I
can't
shut
If
it's
uncut
And
unsubt-
le
I've
never
quibbled
If
it
was
ribald
I
would
devour
where
others
merely
nibbled
As
the
judge
remarked
the
day
that
he
Acquitted
my
Aunt
Hortense
"To
be
smut
It
must
be
ut-
Terly
without
redeeming
social
importance."
Por-
Nographic
pictures
I
adore
Indecent
magazines
galore
I
like
them
more
If
they're
hard
core
(Bring
on
the
obscene
movies,
murals,
postcards,
neckties
Samplers,
stained-glass
windows,
tattoos,
anything!
More,
more,
I'm
still
not
satisfied!)
Stories
of
tortures
Used
by
debauchers
Lurid,
licentious,
and
vile
Make
me
smile
Novels
that
pander
To
my
taste
for
candor
Give
me
a
pleasure
sublime
(Let's
face
it,
I
love
slime.)
All
books
can
be
indecent
books
Though
recent
books
are
bolder
For
filth
(I'm
glad
to
say)
is
in
The
mind
of
the
beholder
When
correctly
viewed
Everything
is
lewd
(I
could
tell
you
things
about
Peter
Pan
And
the
Wizard
of
Oz,
there's
a
dirty
old
man!)
I
thrill
To
any
book
like
Fanny
Hill
And
I
suppose
I
always
will
If
it
is
swill
And
really
fil
Thy
Who
needs
a
hobby
like
tennis
or
philately?
I've
got
a
hobby:
rereading
Lady
Chatterley
But
now
they're
trying
to
take
it
all
Away
from
us
unless
We
take
a
stand,
and
hand
in
hand
We
fight
for
freedom
of
the
press
In
other
words
Smut!
(I
love
it)
Ah,
the
adventures
of
a
slut
Oh,
I'm
a
market
they
can't
glut
I
don't
know
what
Compares
with
smut
Hip
hip
hooray!
Let's
hear
it
for
the
Supreme
Court!
Don't
let
them
take
it
away!
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