Lyrics The Illuminati Polka - Tom Smith

Willkommen to Bavaria, Everybody dance

You've heard that everyone is six degrees from Kevin Bacon
But do you know the Six Degrees of Grand Exalted Mason
For everyone and everything has around it curled
The tentacles of the Secret Masters who control the world
I rule you, you rule me, someone rules us secretly
It's a vast conspiracy, the Illuminati Polka

For several thousand years now, they've worked behind the scenes
They laugh when we buy Dockers; we've all got designer genes
They know if you'll get the girl or pass the S.A.T.
It's kinda like The Truman Show combined with D&D
I rule you, you rule me, someone rules us secretly
It's a vast conspiracy, the Illuminati Polka
Everybody's bank account is serviced by the Gnomes
The Masonic Temple gets the mortgage payment for your homes
Commander Weisshaupt keeps Saddam from being killed too soon
While Crowley and Blavatsky run Wall Street from the moon
I rule you, you rule me, someone rules us secretly
It's a vast conspiracy, the Illuminati Polka

The Media say "Everything is awful but that's okay"
It turns out that Fox Mulder is really Keyser Soze
If Men In Black are in your tub, or birds consult your cat
Duck your head, try not to think, and wear this tinfoil hat
I rule you, you rule me, someone rules us secretly
It's a vast conspiracy, the Illuminati Polka
The entertainment industry just got the Atom Bomb
Dick Cheney and Al Qaeda run Enron with your mom
Your DNA's on CD-R, so heads up, P.D.Q.
You may not have a hope in hell, but at least you've got a clue
I rule you, you rule me, someone rules us secretly
It's a vast conspiracy, the Illuminati Polka
I rule you, you rule me, someone rules us secretly
It's a vast conspiracy, the Illuminati Polka
Fnord