Lyrics Real - Tt17

I gotta go, gotta go hard
I'm lying if I said I'm far in this game
I don't got bars, not good enough to make it far
I used to think, They want me dead
My mental health was on a thread
Depression filled up all my head
I wished the pain would finally end
Yes I'm weird, I'll admit it
Write sad lines, and then I spit it
It's like, now they can finally get it!
But, now I'm good, I don't wanna fit in
I've been a loser all my life
I've been rejected all my life
Never been accepted in my life
But, now my true form comes to life
I'm not a fan of all of these new guys
I wanna think, I'm better than you guys!
I wanna think, I'm feelin' happy!
But I can't think that, because I am not happy!
I pull up a cam, and look at my face
Look at me! I'm so fake!
But nobody sees it
It's therapy season!
You want album 3? Then give me a reason!

Why should I bother stressin' again?
Why should I wake up depression again?
Won't be like 7, not a blessin' again
I dressed that up, I ain't dressin' again
I like 'Outro' on 'Long Way To Go'
My personal best on 'Long Way To Go'
That album was real, but I called it a joke
Can't say how I feel, cuz they think it's a joke
He's TT, he can't feel a thing!
I pour out my heart every time that I sing
I wanna feel numb, and get me a drink
Get drunk, black out! And not even think
But why would I do that? Listen to me
Pull up a chair and listen to me
I'm not hypocritical, I'm never typical
Just sayin' syllables, they say that I'm lyrical
But you don't got the bars, you don't got the flow
That's fine, I didn't ask you to show your opinion, so you gotta go
Why aren't you famous?
I don't even know
I'm pretty young, and I'm doin' a lot
Thank you to those who ain't give me a shot
These past 2 years, I grew up a lot
I learned not to be somebody I'm not
But time changes, I'm gettin' older
Got a spine, and I'm gettin' bolder
Cold bars, and I'll spit it colder
I feel like fame tried to tap my shoulder
It'll come back around, I'll ignore it again
Emotions high, and I'll pour it again
I scored one time, and I'll score it again
My life has hope, I'm restorin' again
Oh, now that I'm open, you feelin' me now?
Shame on you, your a part of the crowd
I got over you, and you wantin' me now?
I'm so good! What you think of me now?
Am I still the fat kid who ruined your life?
Am I still that kid who you ruined twice?
Am I still the one who don't got any friends?
Bet you feel dumb, I live in your head
I live in your head every day of the week
You sent me a voicemail, I had that on repeat
You said that we done, but we never started
I didn't do music, so look what you started!
Thank you A, you gave me fame
Thank you A, you gave me a name
Let's all thank her, now I got a career!
All cuz I wrote how you said I'm weird
But, enough about her, she is not relevant
Thank God for music, I think that it's Heaven sent
I wanna live rich, so my dinners are elegant
I wanna be known, so I won't ever sell again
I wanna say thank you for countin' me out
I just wanna know what the doubtin's about
I just wanna talk, but you drownin' me out
But you postin' for me, and you shoutin' me out
I don't want the clout
I've always been real
I gotta keep talkin' about how I feel
Or maybe my past days, never a fast day
I woke up and prayed that it was my last day
But thanks for the hate, it's makin' me great
I can finally say that I'm in the right state
Got this state of mind, I was walkin' blind
Blind to the hate, droppin' 'Real' to remind!
I wanna be real, when I'm turnin' it up
No drugs or drinks, never throwin' it up
Give me a rapper, I'm showin' him up
I started below, now I'm goin' above
My whole school loves me, I'm showin' em sounds
Sophomore year, they called me a clown
Junior year, I kinda felt down
But, senior year, now, where is my crown?
Quarantine came, and I'm doin' the most
Like the old me left, and I am a ghost
Depression hit me, so I hit him back harder
Got rid of depression, I think that I'm smarter
But, I know it'll come back, depression will come
I shed all my weight from my therapy runs
I have trauma, I've seen all the guns
My life's full of drama, my life isn't fun
No way bro, you're fakin' your lyrics!
Do you think that I care if you even hear this?
Haha; Oh, you were serious?
Uh, you might be delirious
I've heard all the hate, and I push it aside
The earth would be better if you weren't alive!
Do you not know that I thought suicide?
So, that's why I'm real, that is the drive
I'm not always real, once, I was fake
I did a collab, and looked her in the face
She took it too far, and abused my name
She lost her only shot at the fame
I'm opening texts that have sat on my phone
I know that I'm known, but I still feel alone
I don't have somebody I can call my own
I'm feelin' the pain, and I can't even cope
Nobody helped when I put out a cry
Gave them 'Most Hated', they called it a lie
I hated myself while writing that track
I had no friends, I'd never go back
It's crazy to me, I'm makin' em treasure me
I really became who they said I would never be
I don't listen to hate, cuz you can't ever get to me
I'm workin' all day, and I'm makin' a better me
I don't know why, but I feel so depressed
Like the weight on my body is all on my chest
I feel like I felt about 2 years ago
My days are the same, they goin' by slow
I don't go to sleep, I'm hearin' the birds cry
I don't give time to haters, cuz they are not worth mine
I need a spot in the game, I need to ensure mine
I outed myself, go back to the third line!
I'm so real on 'Memory Lane'
I wanna forget, but the memory stays
Let's take a walk down my memory lane
This my life, 'bout every day
Got rid of depression, I'll have it again
Talk down on me, and I'll back it again
I got the bread, and I'll stack it again
Got album 3, I'll be at it again
Writin' this album, I'm not gonna lie
Every song, it made me cry
I found happiness, but it's leavin' again
Leavin' again with no reason again
I'm lookin' for smiles, I'm searchin' for hope
Maybe I'll find it, maybe I won't
I wanna be happy, but Ima be real
None of you know me, or know how I feel!