Lyrics Where in the Hell Did I Park? - TurtleFrogMan

I left her outside of this restaurant, crying
And sauntered toward the parking lot like Jack Nicholson might
I had ended it with her after many times trying
I felt guilty each time before but not on this night

Row after row of cars, I thought "my car's here it has to be'
I looked back and saw her watching me from afar
I put my hands on my hips and thought what a catastrophe
I couldn't remember where I had parked my damn car!

Where in the hell did I park?
If I wasn't such an idiot, I'd already be gone
Instead of stumblin' around in the dark
Looking for that parking place I left my car on
Where in the hell did I park?

She was such a sweet girl I felt terrible honestly
She was deeply in love and so pleasant and caring
But I just didn't feel the same way about her that she felt for me
And so I had to put an end to this one-sided pairing

I could see her walking toward me as I stood in the parking lot
Like the wind brings a duck back a castaway feather
Through her sniffles she asked if she could help find my parking spot
I said "okay but that doesn't mean that we're getting back together!"

Where in the hell did I park?
If I wasn't such an idiot, I'd already be gone
Instead of stumblin' around in the dark
Looking for that patch of asphalt my car is on
Where in the hell did I park?

Look, I hate to admit this but her appearance was an issue
She was a pretty girl but let's say she was larger than little.
I said, "you start over there" as I handed her a tissue
I said, "I'll start on the other side and we'll meet in the middle".

No one would have blamed her for leaving me stranded
She had every right to leave me there searching in vain
When breaking up you say things that are cruel and heavy handed
I felt really bad for asking "how much more weight will you gain?"

Where in the hell did I park?
If I wasn't such an idiot, I'd already be gone
Instead of stumblin' around in the dark
Looking for that patch of asphalt my car is on
Where in the hell did I park?

She found my car at just the time I started to get nervous
She was jumping up and down which her made her winded and red-faced
I thought, "my god this pudgy saint is simply pleased to be of service".
And I went running toward her voice and when I found her we embraced

Maybe I was happy that my car we wound up finding
Or I felt bad for being cruel and that explains our actions maybe
But our hugging led to kissing led to passionate grinding
I said "let's go back to my place and get this party started baby"

We finally found where I parked
If I wasn't such an idiot, I would have already gone
Off to have sex, we embarked
Her selfless dedication to yours truly turned me on!
Now tell me Where in the hell have I parked?