America

The maid was in the garden, hanging out the clothes
While I crept up and shot her dead in the nose
Message in a bottle, violence is how it could spin
One stranded couple terrorized by backwoodsmen
A young man home from reform school, now a burglar
Some sixth graders suspect their principal is a murderer
A man investigates the death of his twin brother
Three kids search for their missing parents and cover
A nightclub owner schemes against mobsters
Four congressmen turn out to be imposters
Five teens try to track down a jewel thief
One little boy knocked out another's teeth
A successful script writer becomes a heroin addict
A surgeon and his ex-wife slaughtered by a mechanic
A bar room brawl sends a law student to the hospital
A little girl found a fly inside her Popsicle
Two bored Indians become bank robbers
A cop searching for the killers of his father
A rapper's lifestyle of sex, drugs and booze
A highway man swindles a trucker's crews
A bum looks in a dumpster and finds a new pair of shoes
An injured jazz musician, dead on the news
A housewife entangled in lies and domestic abuse
A dirty politician tries to rub out his opponent
The outside man fought another man in the rain
A business woman had to sue for the correct spelling of her name
A skinhead who led a fierce biker gang
Involved in white slavery, and Mr. Avery was never neighborly
Romancing a jackpot, he killed his wife and
Drove to Vegas with her head in a hatbox

One candy apple, two white chocolates, three blueberries
One candy apple, two white chocolates, three blueberries
One candy apple, two white chocolates, three blueberries
One candy apple, two white chocolates, three blueberries

She had rings on her fingers and bells on her toes
She'll have music wherever she goes
Seven ladybugs on a honeydew, for crummy you
Mr. Grimez dream from a candy house with a dummy roof
I got a Tommy gun that shoots eggs, and I'll put it down
Pop you in the shoulder with a large revolver and laugh
War clouds, war paths, it's a conqueror, whoever lasts
Like tea cakes and crumpets, shiny bright turquoise trumpets
Gold in the compass, piloting an airship
One sea of clouds, I drop an axe on you now
Shadow on the barn wall, float a newspaper boat
Juice bars and fudge sticks, roller coasters and ferris wheels

One candy apple, two white chocolates, three blueberries
One candy apple, two white chocolates, three blueberries
One candy apple, two white chocolates, three blueberries
One candy apple, two white chocolates, three blueberries

There was a young lady, my wife, who disrespect
And the first day I met her, she had a ribbon around her neck
And she wore that ribbon for years, it hid her flutes
When I'd ask her to remove it, she'd always have excuse
One stormy night while we were in bed
I snatched the ribbon off, and off rolled her head
I laughed myself to sleep, the room spun around like a record

One candy apple, two white chocolates, three blueberries
One candy apple, two white chocolates, three blueberries
One candy apple, two white chocolates, three blueberries
That's one candy apple, two white chocolates, three blueberries