Lyrics intrusive thoughts - kendy

I don't get it and i don't think i will
Cause i don't understand how i feel
This pain is really real, it's so fucked

I don't get it, i feel so finished,
Intrusive thoughts they all stay winning
Been there done that and i don't wanna do it again

I've been so fucked up, i lost my mind
I've been so high, i lost you out my sight
So a lonely day turns to a lonely night
Wait for me baby, imma get this right

Every word i say turns love to a fight
Every time i speak i think i might
Throw up,
The pains excruciating in my chest

It's killing me it's hurting me but i don't want nobody else
It's healing but depleting, i think i do it to myself

I wish that i could change everything that has happened
I wish you were asleep in my bed, together napping
I try to express the way i feel through singing and the rapping
But it seems like nobody tries to understand me

Feel like im a joke; mental state is collapsing
I don't know how to work with you dying and you passing
I'm a wreck, im a fucking mess baby,
I'm a wreck, what's next my baby

The drug abuse is serious, i wish it was a joke
I keep trynna fight it off but lately i don't really know
Is it worth it? am i worth it? is it worth it?
I could repeat myself a thousand times
These methods ain't working

I don't get it and i don't think i will
Cause i don't understand how i feel
This pain is really real, it's so fucked

I don't get it, i feel so finished,
Intrusive thoughts they all stay winning
Been there done that and i don't wanna do it again