Dear Body

Started when I was a child
Watching my mom go on a diet
I thought maybe I should try it
Dropped a size and lost my mind in the process

Waking up afraid of change
I put all my self-worth on my weight
Living on compliments from strangers
Self criticizing in the mirror, years later

Toxic secrets, I made you keep
I starved you out when you needed to eat
But now that I see it
I wanna set you free

Dear body, I just wanna say I'm sorry
'Cause I'd never do this to somebody else
But it's easy to hurt myself
Dear body, you're taking good care of me
I wish I could say the same about you
After all that I put you through
I'm sorry, dear body

Dragged myself back to the gym
When it was therapy, I should've been in
I've never felt good in my skin
And I still wear a T-shirt when I swim

Ruined so many holidays
Skipping the birthdays 'cause of cake
Count every last little taste
Wondering when it would show up on my thighs or my face

I know better now that I'm older
But in photos, I still hate my shoulders
I wanna heal this
I wanna set us free

Dear body, I just wanna say I'm sorry (I'm sorry)
'Cause I'd never do this to somebody else
But it's easy to hurt myself
Dear body, you're taking good care of me
I wish I could say the same about you
After all that I put you through (through)

I said, you were too big
Then you were too small
Too many curves, or none at all
Why was I so cruel when you're me, and I am you?
I'm sorry, dear body

(I'm sorry, dear body)
(I'm sorry, dear body)
(I'm sorry, dear body)

Dear body, I just wanna say I'm sorry
'Cause I'd never do this to somebody else
But it's easy to hurt myself
I'm sorry, dear body