paroles de chanson Things We Say When People Die - George Carlin
Now
speaking
of
dead
people
There
are
things
we
say
when
someone
dies
Most
of
us
say,
lot
of
us
do
Things
we
say
that
no
one
ever
questions.
They
just
go
on
examined
Give
you
a
few
examples
After
someone
dies
the
follow
conversation
is
bound
to
take
place
Probably
more
than
once
Two
guys
meet
on
the
street
"Hey
did
you
hear?
Phil
Davis
died"
"Phil
Davis?
I
just
saw
him
yesterday"
Yeah,
didn′t
help
He
died
anyway
Apparently
the
simple
act
of
your
Seeing
him
did
not
slow
his
cancer
down
In
fact
it
may
have
made
it
more
aggressive
You
know,
you
could
be
responsible
for
Phil's
death
How
do
you
live
with
yourself?
Here
is
another
thing
we
say
This
is
something
that
is
usually
said
to
the
surviving
spouse
Usually
a
woman
because
of
the
way
it
works
"Listen,
if
there
is
anything
I
can
do,
anything
at
all
Please,
don′t
hesitate
to
ask"
"What
are
you
gonna
do,
a
resurrection?"
This
ain't
the
fucking
New
Testament
you
know?
You
know
what
you
tell
a
guy
like
that,
that
wants
to
help
"Oh
fine,
why
don't
you
come
over
Next
weekend
you
can
paint
the
garage
Bring
your
plunger,
the
upstairs
toilet
overflowed
And
there′s
shit
all
over
the
floor
up
there
You
drive
a
tractor?
Good,
that′ll
come
in
handy
The
north
forty
needs
a
lot
of
attention
Bring
your
chainsaw
and
your
pickax,
we're
gonna
put
your
ass
to
work"
He
wants
to
help,
fuck
em
Call
his
bluff
Call
his
bluff
The
nerve
of
these
pricks
Here′s
another
thing
we
say
to
the
surviving
spouse
"I'm
keeping
him
in
my
thoughts"
Where?
Where
exactly
in
your
thoughts
does
he
fit?
Right
between
′my
ass
hurts
from
This
chair'
and
′let's
fuck
the
waitress'
What
are
your
priorities?
We
use
a
lot
of
euphemisms
when
we
talk
about
death
ya
know?
People
say
things
like
"You
know
I
lost
my
father"
Ah,
he′ll
turn
up
You
gotta
stay
optimistic
with
people
like
that
Give
them
reason
to
hope
"Have
you
checked
the
dumpster
out
back?
He
used
to
like
to
take
a
nap
in
there"
Keep
it
up
beat
1 Opening
2 Old Fuck
3 Goin' Through My Address Book
4 Things We Say When People Die
5 He's Smiling Down
6 Parents In Hell
7 People Refuse to Be Realistic
8 Dead Parents Helping
9 A Couple of Other Questions
10 Today's Professional Parents
11 The Self-Esteem Movement
12 Every Child Is Special
13 Children Are Our Future
14 Raisin' a Child Is Not Difficult
15 I Like People
16 Stupid Bullshit
17 Stupid Bullshit On the Phone
18 What a Phone Call Should Be
19 In a Coma
20 Their Kids!
21 They Want to Show You the Pictures
22 Just Enough Bullshit
23 No One Questions Things
24 Proud to Be an American
25 God Bless America
26 Takin' Off Yer Hat
27 Swearing On the Bible
28 You Have No Rights
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