Sometimes

I'm not gone lie
Sometimes I wonder how I gotta die
Think about shooting myself
In the back
It keeps me up at night
Wonder what momma would think
If she had
To see me leaving life
Least she wouldn't have to see
What I've been carrying inside

Stop it

I feel my thoughts is turning toxic
I see myself exhausting
The options I ain't lost yet
Got a monster on a leash
And I can never let him off it
Got a valley in my heart
But not too wide for me to cross it

When I'm talking
I see too many questions I been asking
Like what would my momma do
If she had to see my casket
Like how could I reach the stars
When it's straws for which I'm grasping
Like how could I be myself
When my feelings I been masking

But I'm after an everlasting
Attraction to better actions
I'm tryna facilitate me a life
Free of distractions
After passions and better fashion
I might just start my surpassing
But on the other hand contrasting
I'm really an honest man and

I'm not gone lie
Sometimes I wonder how I gotta die
Think about shooting myself
In the back
It keeps me up at night
Wonder what momma would think
If she had
To see me leaving life
Least she wouldn't have to see
What I've been carrying inside

I'm stronger that that
Unlawful attack
I make on myself
Offering packs
To soften the track
Cuz I been on the
Awfullest path
A novelty past
Ain't stopping me
From dropping the mask
To talk to the man
And tell him what I'm really feeling
Really a ceiling that I see
Stopping me from feeling healing
Really appealing to be a menace
Let the evil being
Take over one time
Until I forget what's even the reason
Anger's exhausting especially when you're a demon

I am a man no longer a boy
I got some memories I can't avoid
I need to make it
It's my only choice
It's no specifics to making this noise
If it's a vision that's hidden you'll miss it
It's typically listening, opening doors
If I'm a villain sinning ain't forgiven
I'm hoping it's different I heard from the source

I'm not gone lie
Sometimes I wonder how I gotta die
Think about shooting myself
In the back
It keeps me up at night
Wonder what momma would think
If she had
To see me leaving life
Least she wouldn't have to see
What I've been carrying inside