Interlude (broken but...)

Only ultimately in the new heaven and in the new earth
Will these storms of life be finally stilled
And that then, is a matter of trusting God

And the grief never really stops
Taking breaths and weighing steps
How many wasted reps
Trying to rediscover the person I was before I met
Grief
Struck down for a while now
I kept thinking victory looked like getting back to the old me
But the old me needed this stomach turning
Gut punching, unsettling sorrow
Because maybe it's shaping me into a more humble, gentle, bolder person
So yes, often I'm oppressed by a sense of void
And yes I'm broken, but I'm not destroyed

When He doesn't give us something
It's because He knows it's better for us not to have it
When He entrusts us with something that is hard to accept
It remains because He is able to look upon us
And give to us the privilege of bearing testimony in that circumstance