Текст песни Nursery Rhymes - George Carlin

The first, time the child hears lyrics are nursery rhymes
And they hear them at that much more gathering age
All through zero through five
And that's their first introduction to bizarre behavior
You've thought about your nursery rhymes
Quite a gang we had in there

They were all on on obvious various drug experiences
Each of them has his or her fave
I got to thinking of this one night
When the word Snow White just passed my mind
I thought, Snow White, right!
Try to figure, y'know

I didn't know whether it was smack or coke
And I thought, well, can't be smack
Too much housework to do with those seven little devils around
Some-something to pep you up
Something to make you want to wash the garage
A little something for the nose

The seven dwarves were each on different little trips
Happy was into grass and grass alone
Just style on little occasion
Some hash, make a little holiday for him
"hey,hey-hey"
"hey, thanks, man, hey down here man"

Happy, that's all he did
Sleepy was into reds
Grumpy, too much speed
Sneezy was a full blown coke freak
Doc was a connection
Dopey was into everything

Any old orifice will do for Dopey
Always got his arm out and his leg up
And then, the one we always forget because he was, Bashful
Bashful didn't use drugs
He was paranoid on his own
Didn't need any help on that ladder

Other people in those nursery rhymes
Old King Cole? Figure what they did
"Old King Cole was a merry old soul and a merry old soul was he
He called for his pipe, he called for his bowl"
I guess we all know about old King Cole
He wanted to get high and listen to the fiddlers!

Hansel and Gretel
Discovered the gingerbread house
About 45 minutes
After they discovered the mushrooms
"Yeah, I see it, too"

Mary, Mary quite contrary
How does your garden grow?
It's a rather obvious one
Sold with bells and cockle shells
And an acre and a half of killer shit!

Little Jack Horner
Sat in a corner
Eating his christmas pie
Stuck in his thumb
And pulled out a plum
And said, "Holy shit, am I high!"

Mary had a little gram, no
Mary had a
Mary had a little lamb
It's stash was white as snow
And everywhere that Mary went
They'd both enjoy the blow!

Little Miss Muffet
Sat on a tuffet
Eating her curds and whey
Along came a spider
And sat down beside her
And they rapped for about an hour and a half

Goldilocks was a speed freak
Looking for a place to crash
It's obvious, who else would go to a bear's house?
And you notice she didn't eat much right?
Little porridge, right in the sack
I know what's happening