Текст песни The Legend of Ganondof: A Zelda Song - Random Encounters feat. AJ Pinkerton

I wake up in the morning, I put on my ugly face, I make myself some breakfast, I spritz myself with mace.
I get my trusty notebook, I mix myself a drink, I grab my pen, and sit and then find ways to murder Link.
Like I could throw some balls of magic, or form a shadow clone, or I could sit and play my organ, or just wait on Hyrule's throne.
Or maybe turn into a puppet, or a giant crazy snake.
But one things sure, you see, his plan would be a freaking huge mistake!
G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrf! (Sing it ladies!) G-g-g-Ganondorrrrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrrf!
I check my daily planner, it tells me what to do; It says to kidnap Zelda, and take the triforce too.
I'll come invade her castle, cuz Zelda's pretty hot, she'll be my Grudo princess, of stay in jail to rot cuz I've got giant rippling muscles, and Abs the size of hams!
A neck that's thick and made of iron, and buttocks as strong as rams.
So if you can't get past my eyebrows, and my complection puts you off, then just pretend I'm your boyfriend and that my name is Aberoth!
G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrf! (LETS GET FUNKY NOW!) G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrf! (1!
HA!) (Music plays for a bit.) I'll break out of the dark world, the sacred realm's a joke.
The twilight realm can't hold me, the master sword is broke!
Now matter how you slay me, I'll come back just the same, except in Link's adventure, cuz Zelda 2 is lame!
So get yourself some heart containers, and a shiny magic shield, I'll get a boomerang that sparkles and a sword too big to wield.
You'd better gather 7 sages, or some maidens, or some tears, but hurry back cuz I'll attack again in another 100 years! (Ganondorf joins in this time) G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, (I CAN'
T HEAR YOUUUUU) G-g-g-Ganondorrrf! (Whoooooooooaaaaaaaoooooaaaaooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahh!!) She life, can be quite fragile, when you're evil and you're feared, she's got a drinking problem, and no one likes your beard.
You've got multiple personalities because you turn into a swiiiine, you deny all memory of agility that was made for CDIIIIIIIIIIIIII.
SO I'
LL JUST ROPE SOME ROWS OF BULBOS AND INVITE THEM TO A TOWER AND WE CAN THROW A ROCK AS CAJER WITH MY TRIFORCE OF POWER CAUSE YOU'
LL BE BOOBIE TRAPS AND AND THEN BULBO STOPPERS TOO, BECAUSE ITS PLAIN TO SEE THAT LINK IN BED CUZ HES A GOODY-TWO-SHOES'
D NOOB!
G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrf! (RAAAAUUUGH!) G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, (T-YAH!
T-YAH!
T-YAH!) G-g-g-Ganondorrrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, (He joins in again) G-g-g-Ganondorrrf!
G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrf, G-g-g-Ganondorrrf!