Metal Band (feat. Jarv)

So dark, so ominous
So scary in a way, um
But so absolutely beautiful

I'll have the performative poems
That make 'em board up their home

And make the sound guy stop watching porn on his phone

Hey, welcome to the shit show
One little hiccup
Give us all your money, put 'em up
It's a stick up
Every time we rock, official highway robbery
Your mom and sisters wanna have a five-way probably
I'm not even a rapper, even I'm anomaly

(That must be sick)
Started doing all this rhyming on the side of my assignments

Back in the day when Mars Volta molded out of at the drive-in
Now kaleidoscopic objects doing dances on my eyelids
Jarv, what is happening?
(The rhythmic monster)
It's a revolt
I said to put all the hands in the air and they did, it's a cult

I said to burn all the shit to the ground
Do it now 'cause I'm tired of being adult
Fuck the world and it's miserable dad
Rob 'em for their cryptocurrency and digital cash
Pay to play this song, it's a long unskippable ad

You want the swagger of a cripple, Mitchell?
Triple the bag

Got some new exaggerations for the back and the front
Welcome to sunny Wells, Maine, Jarv, pass me the (Ah)

Back medicine, raps since back then

When you had to rap better than ass for cash settlements

If we're not funky as passing gas in NASA's caps
Then I think that that acid tab's setting in

And the methamphetamine
802 And 207 legends, no, not them again
Tubular and excellent
Came to give you sex again
Came to get the checks again
Canadians and Mexicans
Ladies and gentlemen

Ladies and gentlemen, I mean bitches and germs
I got this mic in my clutches and until this is adjourned
I'm 'bout to burn y'all, why? Because I am the judge
I'm swinging my gavel, hitting your chick in the nuts
What's up, idiots?

Back to your scheduled program
An old man procuring hoes with toe jams

A slow jam, slam it like a chrome hand cannon recoiling

Everybody wonder where the boy's been
I'm making noise again, that's all that matters, right?
If you are what you eat, then I'm a vagina with an appetite (Ugh)
Now that's one hell of a soundbite
I really don't know what the fuck he
Be talking about, but it sounds tight
Uh-huh, yeah, whatever, fam
Me and my man Spose will join forces and form a metal band
I'll be wearing spandex, singing for alternative chicks
In a facially unaluminum kettle pan

What's up? How you doing, beautiful? Bad or medium?
I could ease your pain if you consider buying my CD, hun
I will be the one to make you feel empowered and proud of it
If you just give me some money for some bud and a bag of chips, uh
It's the vagabond padawan, tattle on
Rapping as if I were trying to battle Mickey Avalon

Sound the alarms, we about to get busy
I'll go berserk and burn down your whole city, bitch

All the Wellstown councilmen wanna smack the shit out of him
'Cause we don't ever shut the fuck up
And the Windsor PD's always looking at me
But they have yet to make a successful bust
We got a hundred milligrams of fans from Jersey to Japan
And they yelling in the stands, "Get rich"
Bitch, crank it to eleven, get the mall flicky
Tripping on your titties, we about to get lit (Ouch)

Six6ix or whatever, I was like, "Oh wow, that's cool"
I was like, "What is that?"
And he goes, "Oh, it's this band, my older brother listens to 'em"