if i were funnier

You can run but you can't hide
'cause everything will come to light
Such is just the way of life
So offer up your sacrifice

Maybe if I had more money
Or if I were a little bit funnier
You would still love me
You would still be here

But I don't want you back
I just want all the time I wasted on you
To give to someone new
Your argument was pitiful
Your "in defense of me" was so damn rude
It went like-

He was there
And you were drunk
And I was home just sitting up
Wondering where the love has gone
Wondering why it took so long
For you to tell me what you did
Why the fuck did you just sit on this?

Oh my life would be much better
If I were a little bit funnier
I'd have it easy
Loving would please me

Or maybe if I lost some weight
And looked like I did when I was 20
You'd still love me
Yeah, you'd still love me