Forgiveness

I find myself, every other night
In a subterranean labyrinth
Though I often forget
By morning
There are many ways to get there
The hotel, with an elevator
Which always breaks
The backyard grill, on the wall
Near the living room
The cellar, of the same
Costa Rican home
Once I am in, I am in
And I cannot get out again

There is a beast which stalks the
Corridors there; I hear him howling
And moaning, from afar
To this day I don't believe that we've
Ever met; except perhaps, the
First time I arrived
When the fear was strongest
And the alienation was most severe
I can vaguely remember being devoured
There is a light source in the corridors
Whose walls are starkly concrete
And I have grown to believe that
I am the one with the lantern
Holding it out in front of me
Though I cannot see it, nor my arms
I only see the thin line, where
Illumination meets the edge
Of where the monster will surely
Appear; but he does not
Except in my mind

There is a room, off a branch of a
Corridor, and it is that room which
I seek; though I do not know why
But an exit clearly does not exist
Perhaps there is a treasure there
Or a secret way out; but what I fear
The most is that I too am drawn to
The monster, as he is drawn to me

But somehow I realized in
Speaking with you now, that
I am the monster; starving
After ages of desolation
I cannot die, and I never will
I do not seek to hurt anyone
But I am so hungry

Hunger is the pathway for all things
Truth, sustenance, evil acts
How we choose to fill the void deter-
Mines our character, our make-up
I understand the dream of the monster
Now, and so it bothers me no more
I have learned how I became so deformed
And I use that knowledge to remain informed
Of the totality of my influence, all around
I integrate cleanly to prevent further attacks
Of my emotions which can be quite unruly

Words are deceptively translucent
Invisible, yet able to cross the thresholds
Between us; and enter and change the psyche
In turn changing everything
Like tools they have the power to construct
And like weapons they can irreversibly destroy
My words have covered the gamut, like any-
One; though I strive to never do harm
I am imperfect, and I have destroyed
Many a good thing
Though the love of others somehow prevailed
Not in all cases, but in many

What's been lost is a lesson I choose to carry

Beneath the ground a man made his way
Carving out silence from the noise in his mind
What might he find straying far from the day
The town above was too busy to notice
In darkness was held a vision so bold
It traced the ages long since past
At last! The end had reached him
So old and nearly forgotten
Lanterns of youth, hidden from view
Had not extinguished, had not betrayed
Loyalty, with him still though invisible now
A solitary song, sung not by one who belongs
Applause, the café; 'twas noise
Now all had become silent with finality
Respect, as he did choose to believe

Patrons are artifacts of another life
Such is the strife of a living poet
To kneel and pray to the monsters within
Glean that they are more than mere symbols
From the edge of the stacks of light
Always threatening to attack our sight
Our sight, it was all that we had
To discern the answer so mad

A man lived his life in that bleak under-
Ground, because it was not of his town
The forests and hills smelled of the will
To keep everyone near the bay
Near the sound
Descending below was the only choice sane
To know is to choose to abstain

Between us all he found, a cavernous wall
A system of roots for the town
Upon which he laid, so neat and discrete
A message for anyone who may come
For years he riddled and spun
Around all of the ancient words
Until his day was nearly done
And now there remains, his monument
To change; so true, for the age in which
We live: the wall simply read
"Forgive"