Deadly Crisis - Feat. Junbug

I go to sleep with a headache and wake up with chest pains
All pain, no gain, just like a pawn in a chess game
Hung with gangs through my adolescence just to be stressing
All questions, no answer since outlandish was standing
God damn it, please excuse me for using the Lord's name in vain
But God damn it, this manic depression's eating away at my brain
These scars won't heal like this, that wound on my back
I've lost friends, split ends, they cut right somewhere back

A love like a lack of love, shit, I always had that
A lack of trust, a lack of funds, and a lack of a lack
A 83, real clean, bouncing on 13s, waking up from my dream
And what do I see? Reality is in my face, and I hate this girl
I tried to avoid her with liquor, but it seems she's stuck in my world
A reminder of things I should've done and things that I did
Like stupid shit when I was a kid that God might not forgive
Like stealing cars and calling bitches, bitches
Smoking weed and drinking liquor, boxing with pistols
When we were just children, still poster child of the young and vicious

Witness myself make a change throughout these past days
Started working nine to five and literally that's what I made this change
They say smile now cry later, when later comes it'll be now
So I never cry, hold them back just like the tears of a clown
They say smile now cry later, when later comes it'll be now
So I never cry hold them back just like the tears of a clown

Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my life is turned out like this
Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my mind's in a deadly crisis
Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my life is turned out like this
Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my mind's in a deadly crisis
Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my life is turned out like this
Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my mind's in a deadly crisis
Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my life is turned out like this
Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my mind's in a deadly crisis

All those thoughts cross crosswalks in my head as my ink blots
Sweat goes across the cross I wear around my neck to help when lost
I thought about, about it path but money that's fast is quickly lost
Yep, opinion pattern only lasts until my ass gets rider's block
So I jog my thoughts in my captain's log to build an enterprise as the stars shine on
Like shine behind bars put my life sidebar
17, 16, I'm a person coming hard the other took the keys from a car
Because I'm so far gone they said that I'm way beyond far

Told her I drink liquor like avion high, when I do that this fire will be five alarm
Hold on now, this is only a test if this were actual song thong talk would have popped off
Enter with a blink, blink fetish and material possession but it's a word so remain calm
Hell, it's hard because how the hell I bought it, man?
My life still seems so hard, I go to sleep with bodyguards for protection, correct
So I don't wake up with any more scars, far be it for me to intrude
But perhaps if you stop, bitch, then things will be different
Oh shit, now my pain's talking back, wait a minute for this pin-pin-pin, intermission

Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my life is turned out like this
Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my mind's in a deadly crisis
Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my life is turned out like this
Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my mind's in a deadly crisis
Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my life is turned out like this
Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my mind's in a deadly crisis
Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my life is turned out like this
Hey everyday, I'm wondering why my mind's in a deadly crisis

I pray to the Lord, Lord, keep me strong
My daddy locked up, my mama left the home, in 2005, we all had to get grown
And just that quick, and everything went wrong, one day, we hit a net, and we all gone
If that's the reason why I act like this, to be told my family, I do miss
I think about a snake, and it make me piss, I look at that picture, begin to reminisce
I drift my mind into my own ways, forget about the bad, think about the good days
Since kids first in the house, who's raised? They did it on their own, y'all, thanks for that
Kept shoes on their feet, and kept clothes on their back
Made sure we always had something to eat

She said, "Strong survival, and that would be on the street"
I toss and turn when I'm in a deep sleep
My family all together, that's how it's supposed to be, but when I
Wake up, damn reality, my little sister have a baby, she don't live with me
When I wake up, damn reality, my little sister have a baby, she don't live with me
Everything I say, y'all lay in cry, while I'm fighting to live, I'm just living to die
Everything I say, y'all lay in cry, while I'm fighting to live, I'm just living to die

Hey, every day, I'm wondering why my life is turned out like this
Hey, every day, I'm wondering why my mind's in a deadly crisis
Hey, every day, I'm wondering why my life is turned out like this
Hey, every day, I'm wondering why my mind's in a deadly crisis
Hey, every day, I'm wondering why my life is turned out like this
Hey, every day, I'm wondering why my mind's in a deadly crisis
Hey, every day, I'm wondering why my life is turned out like this
Hey, every day, I'm wondering why my mind's in a deadly crisis