Lyrics An English Teacher - Dick Van Dyke , Chita Rivera

His going in the Army
Is the best thing he could do
Now you're free to start to do
What you wanted to
Albert, Albert
A-A-A-Albert!

I remember how you told me
I should trust you for a year
It would just be for a year
But it's eight years, Albert!
Eight long years, Albert!

(Rosie, it takes time to build a business!)
It was only a sideline
That's what you said
You just needed some money
That's what you said
You were going to college and get ahead
Instead of being a music business bum
You were going to NYU
And become an English teacher

An English teacher, an English teacher
If only you'd been an English teacher
We'd have a little apartment in Queens
You'd get a summer vacation
And we would know what life means

A man who's got his masters
Is really someone
How proud I'd be if you had become one
It could have been such a wonderful life
I could have been Mrs. Peterson
Mrs. Albert Peterson
Mrs. Phi Beta Kappa Peterson
The English teacher's wife!

(Oh Rosie, I told you, as soon as I get a few bucks ahead)
You said that before, Albert!
Then along came Conrad Birdie

And it was goodbye Geoffrey Chaucer
Hello William Morris
Goodbye NYU
Hello Almaelou

'Cause when you wrote Canard's first hit
Agha-bagha-boo
Then I knew that was it
You were through with English
Forever

An English teacher is really someone
How proud I'd be if you had become one
It could have been such a wonderful life
I could have been Mrs. Peterson
Mrs. Albert Peterson
Mrs. Phi Beta Kappa Peterson
The English teacher's wife!