Lyrics We Finally Won the War on Christmas - El Sancho

We've been at war with Christmas since 96
A few battles won but it was looking pretty grim
Old Man O'Reilly had us down for the count
Then he pulled out his loofa and sponged it out

Captain Hannity renewed the fight
Takes a good good soldier to battle through the night
But he didn't count on our secret weapon
A super dumb president who would do our bidding, oh yeah

We finally won the War on Christmas
Now everyone is down with the sickness
Nobody's sittin on Santa's lap
That mistletoe's a coronavirus trap

We finally won the War on Christmas
Now everyone is down with the sickness
Nobody's sittin on Santa's lap
That mistletoe's a coronavirus trap

Agent Melania was the first to give way
Did you see what she did to the white house display
Her dystopian vision for Trumpian Christmas
Was the first signal that the cracks were getting vicious

Antifa forces then took to the streets
Deploying fake ballots and a horrible disease
Til everyone voted an everyone was sick
And Christmas got cancelled it hurt like a brick oh yeah

We finally won the War on Christmas
Now everyone is down with the sickness
Nobody's sittin on Santa's lap
That mistletoe's a coronavirus trap

We finally won the War on Christmas
Now everyone is down with the sickness
Nobody's sittin on Santa's lap
That mistletoe's a coronavirus trap