Lyrics Dinah-Moe Humm (Live) - Frank Zappa

I couldn't say where she's coming' from,
But I just met a lady named Dinah-Moe Humm

She stroll on over, say look here, bum,
I got a forty dollar bill say you can't make me cum
(Y'jes can't do it)

She made a bet with her sister who's a little bit dumb
She could prove it any time all men was scum

I don't mind that she called me a bum
But I knew right away she was really gonna cum
(So I got down to it)

I whipped off her bloomers'n stiffened my thumb
An' applied rotation on her sugar plum

I poked 'n stroked till my wrist got numb
But I still didn't hear no Dinah-Moe Humm
Dinah-Moe Humm

Dinah-Moe Humm
Dinah-Moe Humm
Where's this Dinah-Moe
Comin' from
I done spent three hours
An' I ain't got a crumb
From the Dinah-Moe, Dinah-Moe, Dinah-Moe
From the Dinah-Moe Humm

Got a spot that gets me hot
An' you ain't been to it
Got a spot that gets me hot
An' you ain't been to it
Got a spot that gets me hot
But you ain't been to it
Got a spot that gets me hot

But you ain't been to it
But I gotta get into it to get myself out of it
I gotta get out of it to get myself into it
I gotta get into it to get myself out of it
But i gotta get out of it to get myself into it

She looked over at me with a glazed eye
And some bovine perspiration on her upper lip area
And she said

Just get me wasted
An' you're half-way there
'Cause if my mind's tore up
Then my body don't care

I rubbed my chinny-chin-chin
An' said my-my-my
What sort of thing
Might this lady get high upon?

The forty dollar bill didn't matter no more
When her sister got nekkid an' laid on the floor
She said Dinah-Moe might win the bet
But she could use a little if I wasn't done yet

I told her
Just because the sun
Want a place in the sky
No reason to assume
I wouldn't give her a try

So I pulled on her hair
Got her legs up in the air
An' asked if she had any cooties in there

(Whaddya mean cooties? No cooties on me)

She was buns-up kneelin'
Buns up
I was wheelin' an dealin'
Wheelin' an' dealin' an' ooh
She surrender to the feelin'
She sweetly surrendered
An' she started in to squealin'

Dinah-Moe watched from the edge of the bed
With her lips just a-twitchin' an' her face gone red
Some drool rollin' down
From the edge of her chin
While she spied the condition
Her sister was in
She quivered 'n quaked
An' clutched at herself
While her sister made a joke
About her mental health
'Til Dinah-Moe finally
Did give in
But I told her
All she really needed
Was some discipline, i said

Kiss my aura, Dora
It's real angora
Would y'all like some more-a?
Right here on the flora?
An' how 'bout you, Fauna?
I can see that Fauna wanna
How bout you Fauna
Do i wanna?
I don't know do you wanna?
I don't know
Go ahead Fauna swallow it Fauna, go ahead swallow it
Wait, I know i got something better to do
Listen
Wipe it on this

Alright, now look

D'you think I could interest you
In a pair of zircon-encrusted tweezers? What do you think
Every night it's the same thing she tells me she got a Charlie horse in her tongue
That's an old one Fauna, listen, no excuses this time you get the tweezers
We're gonna have to sterilize them so
Alright, you ready?

I couldn't say where she's comin' from
But I just met a lady named Dinah-Moe Humm

She stroll on over, say look here, bum
I got a forty dollar bill say you can't make me cum
No-no, y'jes can't do it

She made a bet with her sister who's a little bit dumb
She could prove it any time all men was scum

I don't mind that she called me a bum
But I knew right away she was really gonna cum
(So I got down to it)

I whipped off her bloomers'n stiffened my thumb
An' applied rotation on her sugar plum

I poked 'n stroked till my wrist got numb
An' you know I heard some Dinah-Moe Humm
A little Dinah-Moe Humm

Dinah-Moe
Dinah-Moe
Dinah-Moe
Dinah-Moe
Dinah-Moe
Dinah-Moe
Dinah-Moe
Little Dinah-Moe
Little Dinah-Moe