Lyrics When the Waterworks Caught Fire - George Formby

Home guards guard our waterworks, protection they require
But we got in hot water when the waterworks caught fire
Our corporal started to undress, he looked like Adam more or less
And he wore a sprig of watercress when the waterworks caught fire
Girl firefighters Flo and Toots undressed without swimming suits
It′s a good job they wore rubber boots when the waterworks caught fire
Fire guards and home guards, they answered the call
Red guards and white guards and blaggards and all
Our air raid warden took a jump he might have drowned the silly chump
But his wife grabbed hold of his
Stirrup pump when the waterworks caught fire
Several ducks from Farmer Cleggs staggered out on shakey legs
And started laying hard boiled eggs when the waterworks caught fire
Fanlight fanny what a scream, she dived head first into the stream
You couldn't see her arms for steam when the waterworks caught fire
Fire guards and home guards, they answered the call
Red guards and white guards and blaggards and all
Mrs. Brown across the way, who has a cold bath every day
Was scalded on her - she won′t say when the waterworks caught fire
Stripping off their coats and slacks ladies scrubbed each others backs
The home guard paid amusement tax when the waterworks caught fire
Young firefighter Miss Mcduff, threw her job up in a huff
She said she'd spotted quite enough when the waterworks caught fire
Fire guards and home guards, they answered the call
Red guards and white guards and blaggards and all
One girl showed her figure fine, then she hit a floating mine
Just below the water line, when the waterworks caught fire