Lyrics What I've Become - Ivory Rasmus

I used to punish myself for existing
Thought friends were waiting on the day I went missing
I pushed them back with my thoughts
Convinced that I was hated
I just reaped what i sought

Imagined anger in jokes
So every time they poked
I shot back unprovoked
It's not the way that I am
But that's what self hatred can do to a man

Let alone a man who doesn't wanna be one
Let alone a kid who thinks their life lacks reason
Let alone a loner losing all his day ones
Every day I wake up
And rue what I have become