Lyrics Hard Way Out - Rhxs

I've really got a lot of pain to speak
From way back I've always struggled when I try to sleep

I get these thoughts inside my head, they just make me weak
They make me cut and make me slash and then I start to freak

And blood starts to leak
Again I start to freak

I wish that I could take away this pain and fucking leave
Blood spilled on the carpet it's like a flash for me
I see the shimmer in the knife and then I start to bleed
Blood squirting out my veins and out my arteries
I take these pills to mask my pain, get them from pharmacy's
It's kinda like a partial block it brings me harmony
I guess this pain i have inside it's just my karma G
I battle everyday, it's like I've got an armory
If i could leave this world, I swear I'd leave it harmlessly
But why do that, because the world its only ever harming me
I feel it draining now I feel it draining out of me

I need to charge I said I need something
Recharging me

All these thoughts inside my brain

They're all bombarding me
Alarmingly, disarmingly

I'm half heartedly
I'm half asleep but still I don't know why it's all starting g
Wish I could just wake up to some better days
Maybe switch it up, do differently to yesterday
If I switch shit up then maybe I'll switch up my fate
I didn't realize but realistically I'm heading for some greatness
I'm going famous
It's in my scope and there ain't no way that I'm stopping aiming
I need this life because of all the pain that I've created
I've need this life cause if I don't I'm gonna be left faceless

Already lost myself I'm feeling like I'm in a matrix
All my pain and stress and demons have turned me into Satan

Lucifer, let's talk about self hatred
You could upgrade still thinking that you've downgraded

And I can spit rhymes that anybody can relate with
That's why I'm by myself, cause I ain't ever dictated

July I'm off license so It's vacations
Catch me in Dubai or chilling with some lit Haitians

Man it's been ages, I've been sat up on probation
And now trust I ain't ever catching no cases

No face no case ain't getting no traces
I'm going all out just like Freddie or Jason

Catch me in the matrix
Aiming when I switch the playlist

Hoping that one day
It's me stood rup on the main stage
Hoping that one day

In the future

I get radio plays everyday
Wish it would come sooner

I've got terminal flows and I ain't speaking tumors
Yeah I've done bad but don't believe none of the rumors
Cause I've took a couple L's but now I'm back up and I'm cruising,
Yeah I took a couple L's but now I better than I've ever been

Wish that I could flip the scene
Wish that I could turn it green

I'd hulk smash flip the scene and then I'd ditch the green
And prolly go back a day later just to grab the P's
And prolly spend in a week on a box weed

Listen
I've been murdering flows, And been killing

I'm a self made miracle, I came here from a villain
Now I'm moving like I never flipped packs in my village
Now I'm moving like I never made racks from the drillings
And racks from the killings
Way back WHEN I was willing

Just a dumb youth living
But never really listening

I'm Tryna flip a penny to a pound so I could visit him
Wish that I could turn back time to school days and stop truanting
Wish I got an education but it's disillusioning
Didn't last a year in school, I only got excluded
Imagine if I did I'd be on top and you'd be losing
Man I swear I'm only human I'm just tryna do this music
I'm just tryna push it forward but my life feels like it's muted
All these demons up inside of me I swear it's deep routed
PTSD it brings me serious confusion
All of the flashbacks and less communication
Feeling like I'm hated and I'm trapped up in this day shift

But i ain't got the balls to go and tell someone I'll make it
So instead I lock myself away and write songs till I make it

I'm only moving makeshift but I swear one day I'll take this

Opportunity
I know I should of done it isn't news to me

I slipped up quite a few times but right now it's time to prove to me

To everyone
To everyone that doubted me

All the teachers that used to shout at me
All the people who ever surrounded me

All the screws because they tried drowning me

They done cracked my ribs
And just let me bleed

Please
Lord have mercy

Coulda been Trapped in the trap until mid thirties
But I swung that shot and I hit that birdie