Lyrics Nerd Lust - Schaffer The Darklord

*GASP*
You're that nerd! God you were wonderful, are all nerds as good as you?

Yes

How come?

Cause all jocks think about is sports, all we ever think about is... sex.

La la la ladies and gentlewomen
Lend me your ear
I love every one last one of you
I wanna be clear
It doesn't necessarily mean that I'm some fetishist freak
But if I had to pick a favorite it would have to be geeks.
Oh those nerdy girls,
Those oh so purdy girls,
The wordy girls,
The love a joke, only if it's dirty girls,
The flirty girls,
The blue jeans and t-shirty girls,
The bert and ernie girls,
The pearls of the world.
I see you in every venue, city and state,
You're often awfully awkward, baby I can relate.
When I play cat people live and in your town
You're the one in the crowd howlin "meow meow meow".
Tell me bout your kitties, do they fill you with laughter?
And which cartoon characters did you name them after?
Your house if full of stacks of DVDs and CDs,
You've seen Star Wars even more times than me.
Like me you find summer a bummer,
You've been bummed since the finale of Six Feet Under.
Another number bombed hard at my show but you got it,
You've got a closet full of skeletons you bought at hot topic.
Can I ride your bike? I like ringing the bell.
I know you'll dance to hip hop if you're drunk as hell.
I know that on a date no one will talk about sports
And if you do have a thong on, it's under boxer shorts.
How many smiths tunes can you recite?
In which of your blogs do you most frequently write?
Which sci-fi languages can you understand
And which instrument did you play in your high school band?
In so many ways our similarities are erie.
We share so many paranoid conspiracy theories.
You're watching Twin Peaks you know all the characters names,
Quoting aqua teen and playing video games.
I couldn't care less about your height or your size,
If you're IQs high and you've got 4 eyes.
12 sided dice elf dies and I'm lovin it.
Not hot in spite of being a geek but because of it.

(Chorus)
Nerds, Nerds, I love those nerds,
Shallow vapid model types are for the birds.
Now lemme see you shake it. Shake your inhaler baby,
Freaks and geeks, you make me crazy!
Nerds, nerds, I love those nerds,
Smug aloof hipster types are for the birds,
Now lemme see you shake it. Shake your inhaler baby,
Freaks and geeks make me so crazy!

You're lookin goodie in a dirty hoodie let me see,
Is that an Ask me about my SAT pin on your backpack strap?
That speaks to me! We pass hours dungeon master powers D&D.
Your new animated avatar looks hot
WAIT I got great big goosebumps
I made your top 8! Great great,
I left a dozen comments, all of them flattering,
Like "when we kiss girl, its like magic... the gathering."
Come a little closer, girl, no need to be frightened.
I'm not gonna bite, I'm just a little near sighted.
You are too? Oooo this ain't gonna hurt,
I wanna see your silhouette in your strongbad shirt.
Our glasses clink when we nuzzle,
Organic milk we both guzzle,
A couple hot nerds pourin' over crossword puzzles.
Fillin' letters, wearing sweaters
In any weather forever,
Feel the books of the lord of the rings were better.
You and me girl are gonna have some fun,
We'll play simpsons chess then watch season 1.
Hours of risk, tisk, we'll quit when we're done.
And with the sun comes a daily show rerun.
I brought my high school yearbook,
You wanna see what i looked like back in 1993?
I was skinny and pasty and I had terrible hair.
And still do. You too? Do you still have high school nightmares?
Were you a loner dark and bruting, crusing school anonymous?
Or were you on debate team hanging with the drama kids?
Did you take shop, did the jocks call you Tom?
Did you ever dream of blowing up a bomb at the prom?

(Chorus)

I've loved every last nerdy girl that's been in my life
So much, in fact, I even made one my wife.
And my wifes name is also STD,
Which stands for Schaffer the Doctor, cause she's a PHD.
I love you dorks,
I love you geeks,
Oh how I love you nerds!
Although for this last verse I didn't write words,
So I'll go
"Meow meow meow, meow meow meow,
Meow meow meow meow meow meow.
Meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow",
And I'm out.