Lyrics Can't Con an Honest John - The Streets
Using
the
following,
I'm
going
to
show
you:
A)
How
to
con
someone
using
their
own
greed,
B)
That
you
won't
feel
bad
'cos
they're
trying
to
con
you
anyway,
and
C)
TAKING
THEIR
MONEY!
As
I
have
come
to
realise,
running
the
beats
is
just
getting
people's
confidence.
This
scam
only
works
'cos
that
man
thinks
he's
working
this
scam
And
that
you
man
off
his
mark
Get
your
mate,
let's
call
your
mate
Piers
No,
not
Piers,
let's
call
him
Farquhar
Anyway
get
Farquhar
to
crawl
into
a
bar
with
his
dog
Like
I
said,
the
barman
will
try
and
con
you
later
But
you're
gonna
take
all
his
money.
Anyway,
get
Farquhar
to
pass
into
a
local
bar
And
call
to
the
bar
to
look
after
a
dog
for
a
dart
Just
for
20
quid
for
a
while,
claiming
that
he
hated
it
But
it
was
worth
more
than
his
car
This,
by
the
way,
requires
that
you
find
and
supply
Farquhar
With
an
animal,
and
a
life,
from
your
local
park.
Get
a
nice
dog
that
doesn't
bark
But
not
so
nice
that
someone
might
miss
this
mutt
from
the
park
Anyway,
using
this
technique
you're
gonna
take
all
this
man's
money
But
you're
not
gonna
care,
cos
he's
gonna
fucking
deserve
it
You'll
never
con
an
Honest
John
An
Honest
John
you
can't
drag
down
(Exactly!)
Con-do-lee
get
conned
When
they
think
they're
the
cunning
one
(It's
all
one
big
con)
Neighbour
you
won't
con
An
Honest
John
Now
listen,
get
Farquhar
to
dart
out
the
bar
And
just
shop
for
some
garm's,
maybe
Just
to
pass
an
hour
or
so
I
would
go
shopping
cos'
I
gave
up
drinking
But
whatever,
just
have
Farquhar
down
the
road
Now
you
walk
in
the
bar,
walk
up
to
the
barman
Order
a
jar,
when
you've
caught
him
slouched
on
his
own
Start
eyeing
the
dog
that
he's
minding
by
his
side
Currently
vibe
him
and
start
on
about
the
dog
you
own.
Start
asking
the
barman,
if
it's
his
fine
specimen
of
a
dog
Nod,
smile,
agree,
look
interested
and
cool
When
he
tells
you
it's
someone
else's
you've
just
left
previous
Tell
him,
'This
is
a
very
rare
breed
of
animal.'
Last
time
I
lied
my
manager
swiped
me
But
lie,
and
tell
him
it's
like
a
fucking
Red-Eared
Hunting
Spaniel.
Tell
him
it's
worth
600
quid
and
you
would
pay
handsomely
if
you
were
to
accept
finance
At
all
You'll
never
con
an
Honest
John
(Sometimes...)
An
Honest
John
you
can't
drag
down
(...Sometimes
I
think
I
should
just
go
completely...)
Condolee
get
conned
When
they
think
they're
the
cunning
one
Neighbour
you
won't
con
an
Honest
John
(Keep
listening
though,
it's
important
that
You
keep
listening...)
Now
take
all
his
shopping
off
him
Get
your
mate
Farquhar
to
pop
in
Looking
straight
gutted
a
bit
later
on
He
should
order
a
jar,
talk
at
the
bar
Ensure
he
looks
calm,
warm
with
the
barman
And
generally
start
conversating
on.
Farquhar
should
start
falling
apart
About
how
he's
arsed
up
some
chance
And
how
arsed
up
his
day
was.
Or
in
the
event,
the
spread
betting
he's
getting
ready
to
accept
That
his
rent's
not
getting
payed
up.
The
barmans
mind
will
chime
slowly
for
a
while
He
might
wipe
the
bar,
as
his
mind
is
making
sums.
Farquhar
should
continue
to
moan
about
money
And
that
this
mutt
is
not
the
greatest
of
his
worries.
And
like
'ching!',
the
barman
will
five
out
of
six
times
Kindly
offer
his
greed
to
buy
the
dog
for
a
price
of
300
quid
And
after
some
bartering,
your
barman
will
haggle
and
charge
harder
In
greed
of
the
scent
of
the
scheme
in
his
head.
(That's
right,
neighbour!)
You'll
never
con
an
Honest
John
An
Honest
John
you
can't
drag
down
Condolee
get
conned
When
they
think
they're
the
cunning
one
(The
barman,
is
gonna
see
how
much
he
can
stitch
you
up
for.)
Neighbour
you
won't
con
an
Honest
John
(How
does
that
work?
Cos'
everytime
it's
based
around
someone
who
thinks
they're
Conning
you.)
They'll
never
imagine
the
whole
scenario
is
prepared
solely
for
him
Why
should
he?
That
sort
of
paranoia
can
get
you
in
the
loony
bin!
As
I
have
come
to
realise,
running
the
beats
is
just
getting
people's
confidence.
AND
THAN
TAKING
THEIR
MONEY!
It's
all
one
big
con.
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