Lyrics The Hunting Song - Tom Lehrer

I always will remember
'Twas a year ago, November
I went out to hunt some deer
On a morning, bright and clear

I went and shot the maximum
The game laws would allow
Two game wardens
Seven hunters
And a cow

I was in no mood to trifle
I took down my trusty rifle
And went out to stalk my prey
What a haul I made that day!

I tied them to my fender
And I drove them home, somehow
Two game wardens
Seven hunters
And a cow

The law was very firm, it
Took away my permit
The worst punishment I ever endured
It turned out there was a reason
Cows were out of season
And one of the hunters
Wasn't insured
People ask me how I do it
And I say, "There's nothing to it!
You just stand there looking cute
And when something moves, you shoot!" (agh!)

And there's ten stuffed heads
In my trophy room right now
Two game wardens
Seven hunters
And a cow

Yes, the law was very firm, it
Took away my permit
The worst punishment I ever endured
It turned out there was a reason
Cows were out of season
And one of the hunters
Wasn't insured
People ask me how I do it
And I say, "There's nothing to it!
You just stand there looking cute
And when something moves, you shoot." (agh!)

And there's ten stuffed heads
In my trophy room right now
Two game wardens
Seven hunters
And a purebred Guernsey cow!