Lyrics Give Me Back My Five Dollars - Uncle Dave Macon

"Spoken: Well friends I'm mighty sorry to tell you,
But men's a getting mighty sorry in my state, in Tennessee.
Now I'll sing you a song of a young man whose married three weeks and
Got a divorce and wanted the poor old Methodist preacher to give him
His five dollars back.
But you must remember King David and King Solomon lived merry,
Merry lives for they had many many wives,
But when old age overtook them, they became very calm,
King Solomon wrote the proverbs and David wrote the Psalms."

We decided to get married, my little gal and I
But the day I bought the license, I let my freedom fly
We walked up to the preacher, said yes to all he said
And if I had it to do again, I'd shoot myself instead

Oh, give me back my five dollars, I paid for a wife
I was a fool to pay someone, to sentence me for life

The first month she was sweet as a melon on the vine
I thought it was my lucky day when I asked her to be mine
She look so doggone pretty, she like to took my breath
But when I saw my motherinlaw, I darn nigh choked to death

Oh, give me back my five dollars, I paid for a wife
I was a fool to pay someone, to sentence me for life

I took her to our home up East, I told her to see the sights
She come in about daylight, Oh, "Where do you spend your nights?"
She bought out half the city, silk dresses and gold braid
I could have bought the Brooklyn bridge with half the bills I paid

Oh, give me back my five dollars, I paid for a wife
I was a fool to pay someone, to sentence me for life

Young men stay single, for marriage is baloney
It would break up a millionaire to pay her alimony
Single men, stay single, don't marry you a wife
A bachelor's life is heaven, compared to married life

Oh, give me back my five dollars, I paid for a wife
I was a fool to pay someone, to sentence me for life