Lyrics If you only knew - lee lewis

I've been trying too hard to survive Sometimes I think that I wanna die
I feel so fucking guilty, cause God, I'm so lucky to live my life
So I keep all the pain to myself Losing faith, but nobody can tell
Mom, I don't want you to worry, cause that would just hurt me

So I'll pretend I'm fine, if only knew That my mind is telling me I should do
That I'm drunk and I'm all alone in my room here tonight
Too sad to cry, but it's true Oh, if you only knew
All the shit my brain's putting me through You were caught in your room, straight to my room here tonight

I'm sorry, but I need you Oh, if you only knew
I wish I was somebody else I'm constantly over him
Now I'm falling again, getting drunk with my friends
It's a silent cry for help I wanna get better, do you know

I can't do this on my own, if only knew What my mind is telling me I should do
That I'm drunk and I'm all alone in my room here tonight
I'm too sad to cry, but it's true Oh, if you only knew
All the shit my brain's putting me through You were caught in your room, straight to my room here tonight

I'm sorry, but I need you
All of this hell, oh, somebody help Take me out of this hell
Oh, I'm not myself I'm gonna tell you
What my mind is telling me I should do That I'm drunk and I'm all alone in my room here tonight

I'm too sad to cry, but I want to Oh, if you only knew
All the shit my brain's putting me through You were caught in your room, straight to my room here tonight
I'm sorry, but I need you All of this hell, oh, somebody help
Take me out of this hell Oh, I'm not myself

I'm gonna tell you What my mind is telling me I should do
That I'm drunk and I'm all alone in my room here tonight