Agency Man (studio version)

Sell us a president, agency man
Smiling Big Brother, stern father perhaps
Sell us a president, agency man
A gay smiling nothing we know never craps
One, two, three, four!
When he's closed the schools
And burned the books the way we've planned
We'll get the press together
And the Barry Sadler Band!
(Another one!)
(Rousing, mmh...)
When he's closed the schools
And burned the books the way we've planned
We'll get the press together
And the Barry Sadler Band!
With lots to drink from 9 o'clock
They'll all be bombed by 10
We'll reveal he's bound for Washington
And sell him once again!
FZ: Okay!
Ray: That ending— That ending comes up like ransa-pransa-prance .. .
FZ: Okay, now the next ransa-pransa .. .
FZ: Go!
One, two .. .
We'll sell him in the movies
On the tube throughout the year
We'll sell him by the buckets
To the Okies drinking beer
We'll teach him how to walk and talk
We'll putty up his chin
We'll print his picture everywhere
Of course the Schmuck will win
FZ: You gotta, you gotta sing, "Of course the schmuck will win" on the end.
Ray: Yeah...
Roy: Take it, Don.
Ray: ... that sound kind of funny if we're rumpa-pumping and then we stop and go uh, "Of course the schmuck will win."
FZ: Yeah, it's a little funny.
People are a lot of pigs
They're greedy and they're dumb
I'm sure that's just a simple truth
Look how far he's come!
From the heart of old Death Valley
To the ruling of our land
A simple trick, you simple pigs
Just the way we planned