Oh, You Have No Idea

Now once a lovely lady, a magazine reporter
Met some chaps one day in the forces by the way
She said "Do tell me all about the good times you get maybe"
They said "All right, sit down we'll tell you all about it baby"

Do we have lovely time and get up
At half past nine? Oh you have no idea
When we wake up half dead,
Do they bring us tea to bed? Oh you have no idea
And when we go to bye-byes and they put out the light
Do all the corporals come round, to see that we're all right
And does the sergeant tell us bed time
Stories every night Oh you have no idea

When our dear old sergeant's mad,
What is it we call the lad? Oh you have no idea
When his charming voice is heard do we
All give him the bird? Oh you have no idea
And when we're all parading, does he give us the works
And does the sergeant love to see us doing morning jerks
And does he throw his chest out and
Call us a lot of twerps? Oh you have no idea

Our old cookie is a treat and what
He does to the meat Oh you have no idea
When he makes some Yorkshire Pud,
Is it 1ike a lump of wood? Oh you have no idea
And when it's time for dinner and we all fancy fish
He brings a lot of rissoles in, so we don't get our wish
Do we tell him what to do with all those
Rissoles, on his dish? Oh you have no idea