Текст песни Harem - Chas & Dave

{Right}

There was I large as life sitting in the middle of the harem
All the girls were sitting on my knee,
Tickling me whiskers, looking after me
In came the Rajah drew forth his sword and said
My word if I catch you bending, off'll come your old bald,
Off'll come your old bald, off'll come your old bald head

There was I large as life sitting in the middle of the harem
All the girls were sitting on my knee,
Tickling me whiskers, looking after me
In came the Rajah drew forth his sword and said
My word if I catch you bending, off'll come your old bald,
Off'll come your old bald, off'll come your old bald head

{Right, I think we'll do it again from the top, 'cause I like it.
One two three four, one, hold on Mick,
What we doing there, no stop stop Mick, two three four}

Once I bought ticket for the day, where the Turkey rhubarb grows
I tied a little bit of rag around me head
I'm off to Turkey to the wife I said
I had a laugh when I got there
In fact I had to do a little grin
'Cause as soon as the Rajah popped right out, your humble I popped in

And there was I large as life
Sitting in the middle of the harem
All the girls were sitting on my knee,
They were tickling me whiskers, looking after me
In came the Rajah drew forth his sword and said
My word if I catch you bending, off'll come your old bald,
Off'll come your old bald, off'll come your old bald head

Into the Harem passages I went as soon as ever nighttime fell
This nice young tart showed me around the
Place dressed in a little bit of flimsy lace
The gas went out, I thought aye aye, yeah we gonna be alright
There's gonna be a lot of foggy weather at the old crossroads tonight

And there was I large as life
Sitting in the middle of the harem
All the girls were sitting on my knee,
Tickling me whiskers, looking after me
In came the Rajah drew forth his sword and said
My word if I catch you bending, off'll come your old bald,
Off'll come your old bald, off'll come your old bald head

Back to Canning Town soon I goes,
I thought I better see my wife {well you would}
I went into the Kitchen,
She said to me "I've got a photograph of you to see"
"I've had it sent from Turkey there, you've enjoyed yourself not half"
I had a look at it, I nearly had a fit 'cause upon that photograph

There was I large as life sitting in the middle of the harem
All the girls were sitting on my knee,
They were tickling me whiskers, looking after me
In came the Rajah drew forth his sword and said
My word if I catch you bending, off'll come your old bald,
Off'll come your old bald, off'll come your old bald head
He said my word if I catch you bending,
Off'll come your old bald,
Off'll come your old bald, off'll come your old bald head

{Oh you was good joining in on that one]